“I’ve been going to therapy,” I admitted. “I’ve been seeing the therapist you were seeing after Gram passed. I have learned by working with her that maybe both of us needed time away to grieve separately instead of continuing to live like we were.”
She nodded along in acceptance. “I’ve missed you so much.”
We hugged each other tight. We held on to that love and forgiveness, crying in each other’s arms until there were no tears left.
She pulled away from me. “There’s something else I need to tell you. I’m scared because I don’t think you’re going to be very happy.”
I gave her a confused expression but nodded for her to continue.
“When I left, I was so lost. I traveled for a bit, but when I came back to Arizona, I started therapy again. I talked a lot about Mom.” She paused, and I held my breath. We never really talked about our mom. “I went looking for her, and I found her.”
My eyes widened. “You did what?”
“I know, just hear me out.” I nodded my head again for her to continue. “She was in a live-in rehab facility. I visited her weekly to learn about her life and how she ended up there. I was too young when Gram died to ask the burning questions I always thought about. She was the same age you were when her dad died, and her grief swallowed her whole. She tried to get sober when you were young, but she was too weak. At that point, she had lost all her chances to ask Gram for help, so she figured leaving was the best for everyone.”
“We both understand grief and didn’t seek solace in substances to get through,” I said sternly. I was in disbelief at how she was defending her.
“I did,” she admitted. “I was drinking and partying heavily before I started meeting with Mom. She helped me figure out what I should do with my life. I realized I wanted to help people who lost their way as she had. I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in social work and started the master’s degree program online last year. I was even able to get an internship at the facility where she was staying.”
The disbelief turned into pride. She always sought to help others when she was younger, so social work was the perfect path for her. “I’m so proud of you, Lu. Wait, was?” I questioned. “Did she leave again?”
“No, she’s been clean and sober for two years.” She paused, shifting her gaze away from me. “We moved in together when I started grad school,” she blurted out.
I stood up rapidly. It was one thing for her to be talking to her, but living with her? I paced the room, saying nothing. She watched me, not daring to say anything either. “How could you trust her so easily after she abandoned you?”
She stood up, standing aside me. “It wasn’t easy. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do,” she said, exasperated. “But I got to hear so much more about Gram, and she has so much of Gram in her. She helped me find my way when I had no one. I know I could have gone back to you, and we could have patched things up, but I wanted to prove to myself and to you that I could make my own way even after everything I went through. She understood in a way no one else did. We saved each other, and I think talking to her and getting some closure yourself could help you from holding onto so much hatred and anger within.”
“Are you already psychoanalyzing me?” I sat back down, cradling my head in my hands.
“Maybe a little.” She giggled. “You had a tough life, brother. You took on so much responsibility with me when you were still in high school, then becoming my guardian when you were only twenty years old after losing Gram, and then Avery…” She choked up. “I’m not saying you need to welcome her in as your mom, but try to be open to listening to her story. Maybe you’ll understand more than you think.”
I looked down, lost in thought. There had been many times over the years when I wanted to find my mom. I mostly wanted to yell at her, but I also wondered why she left us. “Okay, I’ll talk to her,” I decided.
“Really?” she beamed.
“Yeah, but can we eat and talk about something light?”
She extended her hand out to me. “Let’s eat.”
I heated our food and brought it to the table, where Luna joined me. “Your house is beautiful. I’m assuming that’s all Serenity.”
“She’s only been here a couple of months, and she has thoroughly taken over. I don’t mind, though; I love the hell out of that woman.”
“So, what’s your story?” she asked.
I told her everything. How we met in Darla’s waiting room, our long phone calls when I was traveling, the various dates, and the moment we realized we were in love.
“What about you? Do you have a special someone?” The thought of my baby sister dating was so foreign to me since she didn’t bring anyone around during those last dark years.
“My special someone is a cocker spaniel named Cheyanne.” She chuckled lightly. “You may understand, but trusting people is hard. I’ve only ever done casual relationships.”
I grimaced. “I guess I’ll have to get used to you being a grown ass woman.”
We were interrupted by her phone ringing. She excused herself down the hall to answer. All I could hear from her was: “I haven’t asked him yet.” I wondered if she meant me.
“Everything okay?” I asked as she joined me back at the table.
She hesitated. “Well…umm...”
