Teddy takes one last long sniff of my hair before hooking an arm under my knees and standing in one fluid movement. Praise for how strong he is dies on my tongue as I consider that soon, another woman will be in his arms, being carried around like a doll.
“Let me feed you before you go? I know it might not have seemed like it at Mimi’s, but I promise you, I make a mean pancake. A fresh batch won’t take long at all.”
One pancake brunch won’t make anything hurt any more, Ellie.
“Alright, big guy. This is your one chance to redeem yourself. Give me something to remember you by.”
Teddy pulls on his apron and gives me a sad wink, and I brace myself to set a new world record for saddest pancakes ever.
Chapter 13
Thwack.Over myleft shoulder.
Thwack.Under my right glove.
Thwack.Straight through the five hole.
“Let’s go, Williams! Get your head out of your ass!”
Shit.If Coach has me in his sights already, it’s about to be a long week on the road. Somehow, I manage to make it through the rest of practice with a shutout, so I think I’ve dodged any extra scrutiny.
“Cuddles, how many teddy bears do you bring on the road? At least two, right? One for each hand.” Bugsy gives me a good-natured pat on the shoulder as we head for the showers. We don’t have time to go home before we head to the airport, so there’s some rare time to enjoy the spa-like atmosphere of the players’ area this afternoon. It’s more luxurious than what the Phantoms have in New York, with a sauna, multiple whirlpools, and an aromatherapy steam room. Apparently, Pretzel has to avoid it because he’s allergic to the aromas, but I’m excited to finally have time to give it a shot.Although I’d love to go back to when every one of my free moments was spent texting a gorgeous girl…
“Whoa, major heart eyes, man. Who are you thinking about?” Nikki’s voice shakes me out of my stupor as I find a free showerhead.
“Uh…”
“I know you’re still new, but you don’t have to be shy around here. We’re not a team that runs around telling each other’s business.”
“Yeah,” Bugsy chimes in. “We’re all solid, and none of the wives and girlfriends talk to the press either.”
Gabri grunts, and Nikki agrees with him immediately. “Exactly. Like Cap here says, only long-term girlfriends and wives get the gossip. Team rule. Keeps the drama out.”
Everyone has made their way to the sauna now, and we all drop our towels before heading in. With the quickest glance I can manage, I’m feeling alright about how I…measure up. Until Gabri walks in.Jesus Christ.
“Are you guys married?” The question is out of my mouth before I can stop it, but I’m more curious than ever about Ellie’s life. She never mentioned having any sisters-in-law, but then again, we were so caught up in each other that we never had extensive discussions about family.Fuck,I miss her. We had fallen into a routine of texts and even had a couple of rituals, starting the morning with an icebreaker and comparing artistic pictures of our lunches each day. I never even got to tell her much about my grandma, and it feels crazy to think that I’ll never know more about her than I do right now.
Nikki scoffs, and Gabri grunts, as if I’ve touched a nerve. “Nah, Cuddles. Nothing serious for the Santori brothers.” Both of them look like there’s more to the story, but I decide not to press.
“What about the rest of you guys?”
Bugsy and Pretzel share a look from the bench they’re sitting beside each other on before shaking their heads, but Bud flashes his wedding ring with pride. I hadn’t realized he was married, but it makes sense. He’s one of the older guys on the team, trying to win a championship this year before retiring. I think one of the main reasons he’s not captain is that he doesn’t want any extra responsibilities that would keep him away from home. After this season, he’s planning on going back home.
“Eighteen years, boys. Nothing like a family at home. I keep telling these guys that having one woman who knows you inside and out and still loves you is worth a million of these nameless hookups on the road.”
“Hey man, the girls I meet get to know me inside and out.Trust me.” Nikki draws a few laughs but doesn’t smile or open his eyes from his relaxed position in the corner.
“How many kids do you have, Bud?”
“Five. Four boys, then one little girl,” he says proudly. “I’ll show you pics on the plane, Cuddles. They’re so damn cute. A handful, though. Thankfully, my wife has her parents next door to help, and her little sister comes over when I’m on the road to stay as well. Without them, I don’t know what we’d do.”
Upon hearing the word “sister”, the sauna becomes a cacophony of “Ooo” and “no sisters!” Bud just laughs when another guy asks if he considers his wife’s sister just as off-limits as a blood sister. “She’s a lesbian, but I’d love to watch any one of you knuckleheads try your shot. Be my guest.”
“What about you, Cuddles? Big family?” Bugsy’s question is one I’ve been waiting for, especially as we spend more time together as a team.
“Nah, just me and my grandma. No siblings, Mom died, never had a dad.”
The awkward silence that follows is thicker than the air in the sauna, and I can’t let them think I’m still the same “woe is me” kid who used to dream about having siblings.
