Nothing had been more perfect in my life. Even his soft exhale against my neck was so sweet.
Then his hand sneaked down over my clothes, and his palm curled around my rigid cock, trapped beneath my own trousers. I gasped, and he froze, so I put my hand on top of his and drew him slowly back up.
Yes, I wanted him.
Yes, that need had been playing at the nape of my neck, a tingling drive that begged me to take more and more and anything he would give.
I just didn’t know if I deserved it. This? Giving him pleasure? It didn’t cost me a thing at all. It only made me happy.
But Aderyn had spent years of his life caged, without being able to speak for himself or make his own choices.
We hadn’t spoken about this. I wanted him to be sure he wanted—well, whatever he wanted—before we went further.
And he deserved?—
Well, he deserved the truth of me if he meant it.
“You don’t have to,” I whispered. “That was just about you. I wanted to make you feel good.”
Aderyn sucked in his cheeks. His silky blond hair fell beautifully over his shoulder when he pushed himself up to look at me.
“Do you not want me to?” he asked, frustration shining in his eyes.
I laughed, just a single, breathy sound, and shook my head. “I’d love for you to, one day, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything for me just because I?—”
Before I even finished speaking, he flipped me onto my back and was on top of me, straddling my waist. He’d kicked his trousers all the way off and was naked, and I was still fully clothed, and I hated every bit of silk that kept his skin from mine.
When he kissed me, his hair tickled my cheeks. His body moved, beautiful and clumsy as he rocked against me.
I groaned into his mouth, and when I ran my hands down his shoulders, he gripped them and shoved them back on the couch above me.
This demand, this hunger, it was all too much.
Pleasure hit me hard and fast, dragging me under before I’d even made sense of what was happening.
I came, rigid beneath Aderyn, sticky in my small clothes. Aderyn, noticing how still I’d gotten, sat up, his brow furrowed.
“Are you all right?”
It took me a second to catch my breath, but I nodded.
“Better. I—hells, I’m sorry. I thought I’d, ah—last longer than that.”
“Oh.” Aderyn went bright red, then a slow smile spread on his swollen lips. “Oh.”
Grinning, he leaned down for another kiss.
“So you felt nice?” he mumbled.
“So good.” Just having him there had overwhelmed my senses. Maybe next time, I’d have a better handle on myself, but right then, I could hardly lament that I’d let him know just how affected I was by him.
“Then why don’t you—” He plucked at my clothes, and I took the hint, helping him strip me piece by piece. He was more careful with the silk and embroidery than I was, but soon enough, we were both naked, and he sank onto the couch with me again.
In the aftermath, I felt tired and heavy, and very much like I wanted to hide him away from the world and forget all of Llangard. He curled into my side, and I pulled a blanket over us both, buried my lips in his damnably soft hair, and fell asleep in that cozy nest.
I woke before the sun came up, not from some impulse of duty, but because of a buzzing in my ears that wouldn’t quiet.
It was Penrose, high in the sky, and whenever the buzzing started, I—I lost myself. There was only one solution, and with a horrible stab of nausea, I felt Aderyn’s heartbeat. His chest was pressed to mine. My mind clouded.
