I drag in a breath that tastes like linen and adrenaline. “I keep thinking—” I stop, swallow. “I keep thinking if I’d hesitated, if I’d frozen, if I’d been a second slower on the lighting grid?—”
“You weren’t,” he says.
“That’s not the point,” I hiss.
He takes another step, and now he’s close enough that I can feel the warmth radiating off him, the subtle vibration of his voice when he speaks.
“Jordan,” he says softly. “Look at me.”
I don’t want to. Looking at him feels like acknowledging I’m not alone, and if I acknowledge that, then the fear becomes real in a way I can’t control.
“Look at me,” he repeats.
So I do.
His eyes are red in this light, darker at the edges, clear in a way that makes my chest ache. He looks… tired. Not physically—he’s built like a fortress—but emotionally, like he’s carrying five years of dust and violence and resentment and it’s all stacked behind his ribs.
“That hit was meant for me,” he says, voice calm but edged. “Or meant to remind me I can be reached. You were collateral.”
The wordcollateralhits like a slap.
My hands clench into fists at my sides. “So what am I, Lonari?” I demand. “Collateral? Leverage? A walking drive full of evidence you can use to threaten someone? Am I a bargaining chip you keep in a pretty room until you decide what to do with me?”
His expression tightens. “No.”
“No?” I echo. “That’s your answer? No?”
He exhales slowly, like he’s choosing his next words with more care than he usually does.
“You’re not a chip,” he says. “You’re a complication.”
I stare at him. “Wow. Romance is alive and well.”
His mouth twitches faintly. “You want me to lie and call you a miracle?”
“I want you to tell me the truth,” I snap, then my voice drops, rougher. “And I want to know if I’m your partner in this—or just… your possession.”
Something shifts in him. Not anger—something quieter. A restraint easing, just a fraction, like he’s tired of holding the line alone.
“My grandfather told me to keep you in a box,” he says.
I blink. “Kel.”
Lonari nods once. “Kel said you stay here untiltheydecide what you are. Glar was in the room. The Nine were in the room even when they weren’t.”
My stomach twists.
“And you,” I say, “what did you do?”
Lonari’s gaze holds mine, unwavering.
“I told him no,” he says simply.
The simplicity makes it land harder than any speech could.
“You… defied him,” I whisper.
Lonari’s jaw tightens. “Yeah.”
