“Lean against me and focus on breathing.”
“I can’t breathe. I can’t. Why do I always mess everything up? I don’t want to go to prison.”
Trying to stay calm while Owen is falling apart is torture, but there’s no other choice. “How can I make it better?”
Still shaking, Owen says, “Sing to me.”
He’s relieved, since it’s something he can do. He clearshis throat and thinks of something that will make Owen happy, but he doesn’t know the words of any Madonna song. He chooses his mother’s favorite song instead.
“A long, long time ago, I can still remember how that music used to make me smile…”
“Oh, I love this song.”
Will continues to sing softly next to Owen’s head, feeling the man relaxing in his arms. By the time he’s done, Owen is no longer panicking, but he is sobbing quietly with his head bowed.
Now that Will has a moment to gather his thoughts, he remembers what Owen blurted out earlier. “You mentioned Nate.”
Owen tenses, and Will doesn’t push him, simply waits for the sobbing to pass. He tries to keep his mind clear, but he can’t stop the dark thoughts from spreading like rot. He has been worried about the possibility of Nate making a move, but he hoped that their latest heated exchange might have been enough to shove the obsession out of his head.
Based on the nervous breakdown Owen has just had on his floor, that hadn’t been the case.
“We can speak on the floor or on the couch, but I need you to tell me what happened. Can you do that, Owen?”
He nods. “The couch is fine. Can I have water?”
“Sure.” He helps him to the couch, then goes to take a glass of water, finding that his hand is shaking.Something tells him that whatever Owen is about to share will change everything.
He brings the water to Owen, who seems pale as a ghost, his eyes puffy, but at least his breathing is back to normal. He holds the glass with two hands as he drinks. Will sits next to him and waits until Owen finally says, “I don’t know where to start.”
“Wherever makes sense to you.”
Owen meets his eyes. “Nothing makes sense. I can’t believe I trusted him.”
“Did Nate betray your trust?”
“He… yes. I was doing undercover work for the police, buying drugs from two dealers up at Eminence so they could trust me. The sheriff wanted to get names out of them to stop whoever is spreading drugs across the county.”
Will’s mouth drops, hoping that Owen is sharing the plot of a movie by mistake, but then he continues to talk.
“I did a bit of drugs with those guys. Nate said it was part of the job, to make me more believable in their eyes. It was just weed and coke—I was never addicted to those, but I’m still not allowed to do that, especially on probation.”
Will can see where this is going. “You took drugs in front of Nate?”
Owen takes a long sip of water. “When he told me about you and Joel, he insisted on me taking a line ofcoke behind this barber shop in town. He mentioned that place a few times before, something about it being secluded in case I’d ever wanted to do drugs without anyone seeing.” He gives Will a stern look. “I didn’t take them on my own. It was either with those guys in Eminence or with Nate that one time. I swear.”
Will nods. “I believe you. But what happened that made you so upset?”
Owen puts the empty glass on the table, still looking too pale and very young. “Turns out there’s a security camera behind that barber shop.”
Oh God.
“Nate has evidence?”
“He waited for me when I left the library earlier. He told me to stop seeing you, that you and he have been having this arrangement…” Owen looks away, once more breathing heavily.
Acid scorches Will’s stomach. He has been trying hard to be honest with Owen, but not about what took place between him and Nate. How could anyone still want to be with him after hearing that?
When Will remains silent, Owen continues. “I told Nate that I wasn’t going to stop seeing you, and then he pulled out an envelope with photos of me snorting that line of coke. He knows the name of my probation officer, and he said… shit, I’m so sorry.”
