‘I was pissed off at you,’ Liv says in frustration, a little louder now. ‘It didn’t matter where Ben wanted to go. I just wanted to get away from you and go somewhere with him.’
Now we’re getting to the heart of it. She’s angry at me, at Ben, at Aury and at herself. There’s a lot of pent-up anger in Liv. She’s such a different person from the girl I met at uni.
‘I always worried about you and Aurora. Always,’ she goes on.
‘Don’t do this,’ I say quietly. ‘There’s nothing there.’
‘There is. But it’s water under the bridge now. I’ve moved on.’
‘Have you moved on enough to forgive Ben?’
Secretly I think she needs to forgive himandherself, but this isn’t a therapy session and Liv would probably throw cold coffee over me if I dared suggest it.
She sighs. ‘I guess. Maybe. Let me think about it.’
‘But it’s not a no.’
‘It’s not a no,’ she agrees, somewhat reluctantly.
‘Good,’ I say and smile sadly. ‘I’ve missed all of us being together. If the three of us hang out and you’re not there, it won’t be the same.’
She smiles, flattered. ‘I’m just worried about Ben,’ shereplies genuinely, now sounding more like her old self. ‘If – and it’s a bigif– I do come along, andifBen does anything remotely silly, then I’m blaming … I don’t know who I’m blaming, but I’m going to say, “I told you so.”’
‘I give you full permission to say, “I told you so.”’
‘I’ll hold you to that,’ Liv replies and I notice a small smile.
‘It won’t be that bad,’ I say, although she might be right. ‘Ialso worry that Ben’s going to do something stupid.’
‘Like try to get back with Aurora?’ Liv suggests.
‘Yes. Exactly that.’
‘I’ll have to cover my eyes if that happens.’
I laugh. ‘I might have to cover mine too.’
Liv laughs in return and it’s nice this, finally. Now we’ve got past the awkward stage. She’s much better as a friend than as a girlfriend.
But thenI’mmuch better as a friend than as a boyfriend. Maybe that’s my doomed fate. ‘It would be nice to be friends, see you from time to time if you like, and—’
‘It’s really not the done thing to be friends with your ex,’ Liv cuts in as if this is a confirmed fact.
‘What? Why not?’
‘It never works out.’
‘Can’t we try?’
‘Sure.’ She sighs and there’s that smile again. ‘If you like.’
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Aurora
The concierge rings up to me. ‘I’ve got a Ben Cavendish downstairs. He says you’re not expecting him.’
My mouth falls open as I hold the receiver to my ear. I don’t even think I’m breathing. Suddenly I gasp air. That can’t be good, can it? That can’t be the reaction on hearing that Ben is in my building. That’s a terrible reaction. Not fear. Just … panic of some description.
