Liv gives me a confused look. ‘Did he? What did Ollie tell you?’
‘Just that he had to sort some stuff out before committing to signing the contract.’
‘Oh, I didn’t know he’d told you that.’
‘I knew this would happen,’ I say out loud, without meaning to. Iknewthis would all go wrong at some point – I could feel it coming. I can still feel something coming. I just don’t know what. And I’ll be honest and say that although things are going well for Ben and me, I thought it might be us who broke up. Not them. Although I don’t know why.
We shuffle forward in the never-ending queue. Why is everyone taking so much time in there? How long does it take to try on clothes?
‘Why did you think this would happen?’ Liv asks pointedly.
‘Because of the reasons you suggested,’ I reply, distracted by the gorgeous sequin crop-top someone’s holding in front of me.
‘Because Ollie’s heart really isn’t in it?’ Liv answers her own question.
‘Oh no, I mean …’ I start, but I don’t know what to say that would help.
‘Because you’d be right,’ she says. ‘His heart isn’t in it. Ollie’s not hugely into me. I can see it. I’ve always known it. It was one of the first things I felt, the morning after we all hooked up.’
‘That was a messy event.’ I think back to the freshers’ night and the fact that four of us went into it single and then woke up the next morning immediately coupled up. ‘So what are you going to do if youknow– or rather if youthink– Ollie’s just not that into you?’
What an odd situation. I couldn’t be with Ben if I thought he was only going at half-pace in our relationship. Because Ben and Iarein a relationship, and Liv and Ollie are … I don’t know what they are. Even after all this time I’m not sure Liv knows, either. Or Ollie. Thank God this isn’t my mess.
‘I’m going to remind him what he’s got and if he really can’t get it into his thick skull that he’s on to a good thing with me, I’m going to dump him.’
‘Again?’ I say sadly.
‘Again,’ Liv replies, as if it’s the most normal thing in the world, which I guess it is.
‘With the intention to teach Ollie a lesson and then he works it out and comes running back?’ I suggest. Honestly, this is berserk.
‘No, for good this time,’ she confides. ‘He’s on his last chance and I don’t want to do this for ever and ever. Not with Ollie,’ she says. ‘He’s so …’
I look at her warily.
‘He’s a bit boring sometimes,’ she says. ‘I realise that now.’
Ouch! Poor Ollie. I feel this need to defend my friend. ‘He’s just a little reserved.’
Liv looks at me sympathetically as if I can’t see what she sees. We shuffle forward in the queue. Actually I don’t think I can be bothered to try on these jeans now. I might put them back.
‘He’s not …’ Liv tries and fails to deliver the end of her point. ‘He’s not Ben,’ she says and I whip my head round to stare at her.
What a strange comparison. Why would she even mention Ben?
‘Hear me out,’ she starts. ‘You know what I mean. You know that I mean Ollie doesn’t have Ben’s energy, Ben’s life. He doesn’t have thatbouncethat Ben has, which captivates a room. I don’t fancy Ben – I want to point that out. I’m not trying to hit on your man or anything. But when you’ve got two men as different as Ben and Ollie in your life every day, then it’s hard not to make comparisons, especially when one is not living up to expectations.’
I look straight ahead in some sort of surprised shock. ‘OK,’ I land on eventually. I’m not sure where to go withthis, so I change tack. ‘You deserve someone to love you, to reallygetyou. Especially after a year.’
‘A year off and on. It took us for ever to get together properly, remember. I’ve told Ollie I love him and he says it, but it doesn’t feel real. I don’t think he means it. I always say it first. So I’m not saying it again. I won’t be the first to keep telling him I love him on a daily basis. And do you know what, Aurora? I’ll bet he doesn’t even notice.’
‘One item each?’ the changing-room assistant asks, handing us our plastic tickets as we find ourselves at the front. I look at her like I’ve no idea what’s going on.
‘Oh. Yes, thanks.’ I try on the jeans in the changing room and, predictably, they don’t quite fit. They aren’t long enough for my giraffe legs and I fold them over my arm, ready to give back, while I wait for Liv to try on a black outfit that she wants to wear for the upcoming Halloween event in the student bar. I’ll be dressed up in something black that I already own, with some cat ears and relevant whisker-style make-up. I’ll also be behind the bar working, so I get to party and earn at the same time.
Liv looks svelte in her dress, sexy. A stunner. Now that I look at Liv, she’s changed. We haven’t seen much of each other over the summer, other than when I went up to her parents’ house in Northumberland for a long weekend of staying in, watchingGossip Girlre-runs together and eating sack-loads of crisps. Other than that, I was busy working and Liv was busy … breaking up with Ollie and then getting back together with him, as it turns out.
‘OK. Game plan?’ Liv asks as we leave Topshop and standnear the entrance, trying not to get jostled by the hordes of women coming and going from the store. ‘Where next? Selfridges? Go and look at expensive make-up that we can’t afford or head back home—’
