“What if it’s a newer symptom? Something that developed over the last… three years?”
“I think it’s best that you speak with her doctor, Mr. Lowell,” she said, her voice gentle but firm. I wasn’t going to get anything more out of her. “He’ll have the answers you’re looking for. I can put a message in to have him call you.”
Answers. I wasn’t sure I wanted those. Answers meant responsibility. They meantIhad to take responsibility for the woman who had terrorized me my entire life. They meant I’d have to care more and be more present.
I didn’t know how to do that.
“Sure.” It felt like the thing I was supposed to say, even when I didn’t want to have that conversation. I wasn’t sure I was ready to deal with this part of my mother on top of everything else. “Have him make the call, and I’ll talk to him. Thank you.”
“Of course, Mr. Lowell.Would you like to come in and see your mother? She’s been asking for you.”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair, as the guilt burned hotter in my chest. I absolutely didn’t want to do that.Why should I have to after everything she’d put me through?Did her decline mean my feelings didn’t matter?
Honestly, it probably did.
“I’ll see what I can do with my schedule,” I told her and left it at that, ending the conversation. There was no good way to explain my feelings to a woman I didn’t know, and truthfully, she wouldn’t care.
Instead, I focused on the only thing I could: finding a good repairman to help me fix this damn house so I could leave. If I kept moving, I wouldn’t think about her inPeaceful Pines.I wouldn’t have to think about how unfair it was that she was very likely going to forget everything she’d put me through. Little by little. And all the while, I’d be stuck with those memories.
CHAPTER 49
maverick
You’re kidding, right?” I demanded. I stared at Frank, waiting for the biggotchamoment, but it never came. Instead, the old man just shook his head, serious as ever.
“You’re the best repairman I’ve got, and the only one I trust to get this big of a job done,” he said simply. Any other time, I would’ve been thrilled with the compliment.
“But you know who lives at this address, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“So you know that I can’t go,” I snapped.
“You can, and you will,” Frank replied. He sighed as he crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair. “Look, I admire what you’re trying to build for yourself here, kid, and I think you’ve got a lot of potential, but they’re influential customers. They want to hire my company for a job, and so, I have to say yes, or I risk their wrath. No one risks their wrath and comes out unscathed. I think you know that.”
Yeah, I fucking did.
“Now, I won’t be around to run this company forever. I have two choices… I can shut it down, or I can give it to someone.”
Wait…what?
“You want to give me your company?” I asked stupidly.That was what he was saying, right?
“Not yet, I don’t,” he said. “But it’s not off the table as far as options go for the future. You’re the hardest-working employee I’ve got, you’re not afraid to learn, and my customers actually like you. But you need to make nice with my customers—allmy customers. Do you hear me?”
“Yes, Sir,” I muttered and shut up. There was no way I was getting out of this assignment without losing my job.And I needed this job.
“Good. How did your last meeting go? Are you going to celebrate your last day of parole?”
“Yeah, I was thinking I’d go out and get drunk. See where the night goes,” I joked. It didn’t land.Not even close.The severe look on Frank’s face actually made me a little uncomfortable. “I’m fucking kidding, Frank. I’m not going out drinking.”
“Okay.” He let out a slight laugh, like he wasn’t quite sure he believed me.
“Jesus fuck,” I muttered and got to my feet. My anger flared, and I did my best to keep it in. After everything, I thought atleast Frank believed in me.I wasn’t so sure anymore.“I’m not an idiot. I’m not about to throw away everything.”
“Okay.”
“And I’m going to do this job and show you I deserve the damn company.” Did Iwantthe company?I didn’t have a clue. I was just mad at the insinuation that I’d throw everything away so easily like that. Not after everything I’d put into trying to do better. To be better.
