Bor grinned. “Och, I can only thank the angels for that. I’m not sure I believe in them, but I was desperate to contact you, and I prayed for them to bring you to me.”
“Why?” Loki stood up to face the old man, just now noticing how tired his eyes were, how the color of his skin had a slight yellowish cast.
Bor took a deep breath and let it out slowly, shifting his gaze from his feet back up to Loki’s eyes. “Because I’ll not be of this world much longer. I seek to find someone to take on my work, to keep searching for the lost souls, the weak bairns, the orphaned. Your sire told me you had your own castle, and I’d hoped you could help me.”
“You want me to take all the bairns home with me now?” Loki was in shock, not sure if he could do this without first talking with his sweet Bella.
“Nay, please do not take them from me now. Bestla would be devastated. I’m not leaving yet, and you still have a challenge or two ahead of you, but I was hoping I could send a messenger to you when my time was near. And I would ask that you travel to Ayr and Edinburgh once or twice a year to find the newest lost souls, bring them to a warm home.”
Loki nodded, thinking about his proposition. He knew there were many generous souls at Grant land who would gladly help him. His mother, Gracie, Kyla, Ashlyn and Magnus, Aline, and so many more. He had plenty of room in his keep, and needed to build his own people to add to the might of Clan Grant. “I’d be happy to, if you’ll allow us to take Ami with us. ‘Twould break Kenzie’s heart to leave without her. We’ll wait to leave until she’s well enough to make the journey, of course.”
“I can agree to that. I do not wish to lose another bairn.” His sadness changed as the ends of his lips curved up ever so slightly. “So you’ll come when I send a message?”
He nodded…
Chapter Ten
Loki returns home to devastating news.
They were almost home. The Grant guards surrounded them, assisting their travel through the more treacherous areas. Once they arrived at Castle Curanta, he hopped off his horse. “Forgive me,” he announced to all of them, “but Jamie and Fergus will assist you from here. I must go to Bella. Jamie—” he handed Ami over to him, “—please bring her inside but ‘tis verra important that you keep her warm.”
With that, he raced across his courtyard and up the steps to his hall. There were few people inside, he noticed, but all were somber, including his mother. He waved at them as soon as he was inside the door and asked, “Bella?”
“Upstairs, Loki.” His mother pointed to the staircase, and he chose not to focus on the sad expression on her face. Surely it just meant that Bella hadn’t delivered yet, that they were overanxious waiting for the bairn to come.
He took the steps three at a time and arrived at his chamber, opening it with a knock so as not to startle his wee wife. He stepped inside, surprised to see Gracie, Aunt Caralyn, and Aunt Maddie at Bella’s bedside.
He could hear her sobs under the covers, and all he could think was the worst. Their bairn. What had happened to their bairn?
“Aunt Maddie?” he whispered.
She strode over to his side and took his hands in hers. Caralyn grasped his shoulders. “Loki,” she said, “Bella lost the bairn. I’m so sorry.”
Gracie came over and gave him a quick hug, mumbling some kind words, but he didn’t hear them. His gaze was focused on Bella’s shape under the covers.
He heard the door close behind him as the women left, so he moved over and sat on the edge of the bed. “Bella?”
She finally popped out and threw her arms around him. “Loki, I’m so sorry, so sorry. Forgive me.”
He hugged her to him, wrapping his arms around her tightly and taking in her sweet scent, which reminded him that he was home. They had lost the babe, but she was safe. “What happened? Why are you apologizing?”
She pulled back, her breath hitching between sobs. “I lost the babe. ‘Twas a wee lassie, and she never took a breath.”
“But why are you apologizing? ‘Tis not your fault.”
“Because I should have told you, but I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. I didn’t want to believe it.”
“Believe what?”
“The bairn had stopped moving in my belly.” She wailed two more times before she could stop crying long enough to talk again. “I loved her so much, and I didn’t wish to admit she was gone. But Caralyn had told me a sennight before you left to pay attention to the babe’s movement. The babe stopped movingbefore you left…and she was born two days afterward. She never took a breath. I held her close and we had to bury her while you were gone. I’m so sorry. I should have told you.”
“Och, sweet Belle. Do not apologize.I’msorry. I wish I had been here with you. You should not have gone through it all alone.”
“Oh, Loki, she was so beautiful. I wished for a way to breathe life into her, but there was no hope. She was so tiny.”
Loki held Bella while she sobbed, not knowing what else to do. They’d lost a daughter. After all he’d just been through, he couldn’t help but ask why this would happen now.
“Husband, Caralyn said there is a way to keep me from carrying again. She has herbs to give me. I don’t know if I can go through this again. ‘Twas so painful. I hope you’re not upset with me. I tried to be a good mama and eat well so she would be a big bairn, but I failed. She says we can change our minds later, but I could not handle carrying again right away. Please?”
