“That was before…” His gaze shuts down right before my eyes. “It was easier to see the good in me when you didn’t know I murdered a man.”
Oh, hell no. I’m not letting him feel bad about this. “You were justified.”
“You think I was?”
“Yes.”
“And what about when I was an asshole to you?” As if trying to convince me he’s a monster, he curls his fingers around my throat. Squeezes. “Can you look me in the eye and say I was justified then?”
“You weren’t, but I don’t blame you. I’ve been just as big of an asshole for not calling. For not fighting for what I wanted.” I lean forward, clutching his neck, dragging him down until our faces are inches apart. “That’s all in the past now.”
“It isn’t. Not all of it. See, I’d been selfish.” His eyes flare. “Had been looking out for myself.”
“Before you explain, you need to know this.” I’m done jumping to conclusions. Done with half-truths.
“What?”
“I won’t leave even after you’ve told me everything.”
He blinks, the corners of his mouth ticking up in the softest smile.
Then he starts.
“I’m sure you remember your brother caught us kissing.” A growl reverberates in his chest. “And that by the time you woke up, I was gone.”
“I do,” I breathe out, determined to put the past behind me as fast as possible.
“It was because of him. Barclay gave me an ultimatum.” Duncan pauses, his tone deadly. “Leave town for good, or stay there and fight for you like I’d told him I would.”
Emotion wells in my chest. I’m warm for a second.
Murderous the next. “What else?”
“If I chose to fight for you, he said he would’ve turned me in to the authorities.” The confession is a slap in the face. A kick, a punch, a stab. “I was poor. Your family had a lot of pull other than wealth. And though we were both equally guilty, who would’ve taken my word over Barclay’s?”
“I would’ve.” I nearly break skin with how tight my nails dig into his neck. “Me. If you had just come to me and explained yourself, I would’ve understood. We could’ve run off together.”
“I had no way of knowing that.” Regret roughens his voice. “Whose side you’d choose.”
When I gasp, he grabs my hip, buries his fingers deeper into my flesh. A silentdon’t leave.
“I waited for you to text or call.” He strokes my jaw, each brush of his thumb catching the new wave of tears pouring from my eyes. “Anything. I…I figured, if you chose us, you’d come find me. Then it’d mean I could tell you everything without risking being thrown in prison. I was such an idiot.”
“Duncan.” My chin quivers. My vision blurs from crying. “I’m so sorry. I swear on everything that I would’ve chosen you. I even chose you when I didn’t reach out, wanting to protect you frommyself. I was wrong, but I didn’t know any better. Do you hear what I’m saying? I will always choose you.”
A beat or a million pass as he looks me dead in the eye.
“What?” I ask when he won’t talk to me. “What is it?”
“I just left you with him.” A line forms between his eyebrows. “I’m—fuck, I’m sorry. I thought I was being thorough; I thought I had it all figured out. Fuck.Fuck.”
“You couldn’t have?—”
“Stop it.” He shakes my head. My teeth chatter. “Please. Don’t comfort me.”
I can’t take another second of this. “Duncan, listen to me.”
“No, you listen to me,” he cuts me off, his thumb resting on my lips. “Over the years, once my work and investments made me a wealthy man, I started tying up loose ends. Like buying the property where we buried a man from Barclay with my shell company and burning what was left of the skeleton. Like sneaking into town often to stalk you. Or sending a PI to look into you and Barclay. But I never considered you might need saving. Not once.”
