I was just trying to keep my head above water at this point. I paid my bills, went to work, and came back to my apartment to look for more baby shit online that people were getting rid of. I didn’t want anything to do with Becky, but my baby would know I loved him or her.
Her.
Sara, my old secretary, followed Becky on social media and saw that she did a gender reveal and had a baby shower with everything pink. She sent them to me, when I asked if she still followed her. I had hoped to be able to be a part of the naming process, but that was going to be something my lawyer would have to work on because Becky was pushing back. Hard. I was likely going to have to get a court order saying I was able to be a part of choosing one of our daughter’s names.
I liked the name Kaleen. But who knew what she would get with her crazy mother making the decisions?
Therapy was going well, also. It was slow, and I knew that a big part of why the progress was being so slow, was because of me. I didn’t want to accept reality. I didn’t want to accept that I’d lost her. And that it was all my fault. I didn’t want to acknowledge that I’d been stupid and ignored Devin’s warnings about Becky. I hadn’t respected her or her boundaries. And, getting down to the heart of why I didn’t, was because I thought I’d be able to say no to Becky. I was cocky that I wouldn’thave any kind of attraction to her, which was dumb, because she was attractive.
I was weak.
I was also cocky in my belief that my wife would always be there, always waiting for me to come back when I was ready. We’d promised forever. But I was learning that promises don’t mean shit when the vows were broken.
And I broke our vows first.
I still remember rushing out of that courtroom after hearing that she’d collapsed and feeling my heart in my throat, worried as hell, all for her. It felt like my stomach fell out of my ass. I fought through the throng of people to get to her, but, when I saw the way, she looked at that man holding her, the way he fussed over her…I knew.
It was clear as day that he loved her and she cared for him a great deal, if she didn’t love him already.
It was official.
I’d lost her.
Like a fucking dumbass.
*****
Six Months Later
Therapy had been going quicker this past month, thankfully. And I think a lot of that had to do with the fact that I moved with Kaleen across the country. My mom got custody of her, and now they both live with me full time while I serve our country. It was worth all of the time and money I put into a lawyer to get her and to get Becky’s rights terminated. It tookfour months of pure hell where I worried about Kaleen every day. I went over to her apartment every day, just to see if I could log onto the wifi and log into the camera she had on her crib.
It was another way that I had been gathering evidence.
Mom and I were determined now that, since we had her and there was no way she could ever come back, that we were going to give Kaleen the best life possible. And that started with naming her Kaleen officially.
It was leagues better than Princess.
Mom and I were given a house on the base, and we were lucky enough that it was across the street from a playground, and a few minutes drive away was a day care as well as the commissary. I could care less that I was a guy in my early thirties living with his mom and daughter. That suited me just fine. I wasn’t planning on dating anyone.
Ever.
I was perfectly content with living this way until Mom found someone new, or Kaleen moved out and went to college. Whichever came first.
*****
Cash’s POV
Today wasfinallythe day.
I’d been waiting, watching, taking note of her mental status and how she’d been with me for the last six months. She had been slowly getting herself together, bit by bit. It was to myextreme pleasurethat I got the chance to sit back, patiently wait and watch as she grew into an even more amazing woman. Shelooked more and more magnificent the harder she was working and building herself back up.
But today. Today was the day.
I was going to ask Devin toofficiallybe my girlfriend. It was a beautiful warm, sunny evening, and I knew about this perfect little Italian restaurant where I had booked their best table on their back patio. We’d been seeing each other, as friends, but more, for a little more than six months because I had wanted her to becompletelycomfortable with me before I made things official between us. I had to give her the proper time to heal, for her to come to me.
I was there, always. Always taking her out to try new things and find things she enjoyed, or things she disliked. Those were some fun times too. I also took her to places I enjoyed. I planned to show her all the little hidden gems I’d found over the years. All the hole-in-the-wall restaurants and bars. I managed to sweet talk my boss into letting me have some time off, matching my schedule with hers.
I had started planning several vacations that I wanted to take her on as soon as she got approval for time off. And the thought of her? In a bathing suit? While we were trying to build a friendship and sticking to ‘seeing each other’ but unofficially?
