“Close your eyes, baby,” I tell him, grabbing his face wash and lathering it between my palms. He does as I say, closing his eyes.
He looks fragile, his eyelashes brushing against his cheeks. The delicate skin covering his brown irises is slowly gaining back color, the purple bruising disappearing with every passing day.
I rub the soap into his skin, carefully avoiding his eyes and his mouth. When I’m satisfied, I can’t resist leaning down to kiss his lips.
He’s perfect.
When we’re finally in bed, tucked in with Raiden’s head resting on my chest, I can ignore the pain in my dick for long enough to truly treasure him laying in my arms, feeling the warmth of his body against mine and his heartbeat against my stomach.
He’s restless though, he keeps moving and adjusting, similar to what he was doing in the kitchen earlier when he was trying to woo me. But now the wooing is moot and there’s something else bothering him.
“Are you in pain?” I ask quietly in the darkness of our room, the only light coming in is a small stream from the streetlight outside that barely cuts through the crack in our curtains.
“No,” Raiden answers quickly, but then still keeps shifting uncomfortably.
“What is it then?”
It’s silent and I think he’s not going to answer me, maybe it’s something he wants to deal with on his own, and I respect his boundaries and his independence enough that if that’s what he wants to do, I’ll let him. But I also want him to know that he doesn't have to confront anything on his own if he doesn’t want to.
“I’m worried…” He trails off and I wait for him to continue.
When he doesn't, I probe further, “About?”
He moves again, this time taking his head off my chest and I feel his absence, the cold sneaking in as quickly as he left and I have to fight myself from dragging him back on top of me. Even though he was well enough to come home, he isn’t back to one hundred percent yet.
“That I’m not enough for you.” It’s so quiet I almost miss it and I stare at him in shock when his words finally process.
I flip on the light, bathing the room in its bright rays and I sit straight up in the bed, letting the blue blankets pool around my waist. Raiden is at the edge, his legs hanging over like he’s preparing to run away.
“Come here,” I demand, reaching for him. He narrowly avoids my hand and I harden my gaze to look at him. He won’t meet my eyes, keeping them focused on his fingers as he picks at his cuticles.
“That night… when I left… I saw you and Liam. The two of you just madesense.He’s calm and collected and has a steady job. He has so much more to offer you than I do. I figured if I took myself out of the equation then you two could be happy together…”
With every syllable he utters my anger grows until I’m a volcano of fury waiting to explode.
“That’s suchfuckingbullshit!” I exclaim when he doesn’t keep talking. He opens his mouth to respond but I cut him off, refusing to let him utter a word until I say my piece. “I chose you, Raiden.You.I don’t give a fuck about anyone else. Youdon’t have tooffer meanything, who you are is enough. It has always been enough. I’ve been in love with you since the first day we met, when I saw you spinning in circles in your front yard. Even when we weren’t together, I never gave anyone else my heart. It has always been reserved for you.
“So get that shit out of your head and come lay down beside me so we can go to sleep. And when we wake up tomorrow, I’m going to show you the surprise I’ve been working on and then I’m going to suck all those bad thoughts out of your head right through your dick, got it?” My chest is heaving by the time I finish my monologue and Raiden is staring at me wide eyed.
His pupils are dilated and if it wasn’t for the painful pulse in my dick from my new piercings, I would bend him over this bed and spank him until he got it through his thick head that he’s the only one I want. But that’ll have to wait until I’m healed. I’m keeping the thought on the back burner though.
“Oh… um–” Raiden stutters, but does as I demanded and comes and lays back down beside me. I flip the light off, and band my arm around him, making sure he doesn’t go anywhere while I’m sleeping.
“I love you…” He says, kissing my chest and nuzzling into the dark hair and slightly tugging on it with his fingers.
“And I love you, no matter what.”
No matter what.
44
JERICHO
My dick doesn’t hurt as bad as it did last night, and when I finally manage to extract myself from Raiden’s grip, I exhale a deep breath of relief.
Raiden snores softly, and grabs my pillow, seeking my warmth even when he’s not conscious. I kiss his forehead, tucking his hair behind his ear. He mumbles something sleepily, but then his breaths even back out.
As he sleeps soundly, I work on making him breakfast. It’s not much, but it’s better than the options he had at the hospital. I felt bad every time I saw him attempt to swallow a bite of oatmeal they made him eat. By the time they felt confident in his ability to swallow without risk after having the feeding tube, he was craving everything under the sun.
