“Bike,” I confirm. He blows out a long raspberry, his lips flapping together as he considers my offer. I don’t want him to turn me down. I want him to accept the offer and take on myexcitement. We can put all of our issues behind us for now, the excitement at having my friend again and being able to ride my bike is too good to pass up.
“Fuck it, come pick me up from my parents’ in thirty. Do you have a helmet for me?”
“Yes I do.” I think.
I start my bike up, feeling the purr of the engine underneath me as I back it out of the space I store it in. It doesn’t get ridden as much as I would like, but the feeling of it underneath me is an excitement I thought was lost. I navigate between my car and the single person canoes I have hanging on my wall. When I’ve cleared the obstructions, I back the bike out to face the road that leads out of my apartment complex. I give the bike some power, twisting the throttle and letting it coast through the lane between the tall buildings.
Getting out of the complex, I gun it. Letting the bike take me where I need to go, weaving around the potholes and batches of leaves that have fallen in the road. It's still relatively early enough in the morning that not a lot of people are out, and that bodes well for me so I don’t have to worry about as many idiot drivers.
When I pull up to Raiden’s parents, I see my parents' car is in the driveway at their house. I knock on Raiden’s door and wait patiently for him to come out.
Raiden opens the door, smiling shyly. He’s dressed more lowkey today, in a pair of light washed ripped jeans and a tight, long sleeve red t-shirt. His hair is half pulled up into a ponytail, the darkness of his roots paving way for the auburn.
“I’m gonna run over and see my parents real quick, do you want to come?”
“I’ll wait out here,” he says, going over to stand by my bike and stare at it like it’s going to reach out and bite him.
“I’ll be right back, but you can sit on it and wait if you want. I have a helmet for you in their garage.” Raiden trails his fingersacross the body, his bony fingers tracing across the intricate lines I painted right after I bought it. He doesn’t say anything, so I leave him to it while I run into my parents’ house.
I open their front door, hollering out for my mom while I make my way to the garage to let them know it's me and not some stranger breaking in and trying to rob their house.
“Sweetheart! What are you doing here? Is that your bike I heard?” She sets the rag she was using to dry dishes with on the counter and wipes her hands down the front of her apron.
“Yeah mom, me and Raiden are riding out to the Carpenter’s house to see their Halloween decorations.” I open the door to the garage, rummaging around in one of my old boxes for my spare riding gear that I keep over here in case mom wants to go on a ride with me. Last time she went, she vowed she would never do it again. I guess she didn’t enjoy the close call we had when an old lady ran the stop sign and pulled out in front of us. I could hear my mom shrieking from inside my helmet.
I see her raise her eyebrows in question, but she doesn’t say anything, so neither do I.
“Me and dad went out there yesterday. I won’t tell you what theme they chose this year, but it was amazing. I asked him to go by tonight when it’s fully lit up. We’ll probably do that then come home and watchFrankenweenie. Do you and Liam want to come over?” My mom steps inside the garage, picking a box and thumbing through it. “What are you looking for?”
“I’ll ask Liam about tonight, he had a small workload today so I’m sure we’ll be over later. Are you going to bake cookies? And I’m looking for a small helmet that’ll fit Raiden.”
“Aha!” She grabs the helmet that was tucked under an old Christmas blanket that I brought back from deployment, a gift that was sent from a family in Austin as part of an Adopt-A-Troop campaign. The little kid drew all over it with a sharpie, and in the letter the parents wrote, they told me they considered not sending it. But every time I saw it when I laid down fora few hours of sleep, I pulled that blanket tight around me and hoped that the kid was tucked safe into their bed without a hint of worry for the world.
Mom hands me the helmet, and I tuck it under one arm and wrap my other one around her shoulders. She tilts into my side, bumping her hip against mine.
“What are your plans for Halloween night?”
I shrug my shoulders, letting my arm fall to my side and walking back into the kitchen. “Liam wants to hand out candy at his house with Jojo. But that’ll only take a few hours because the City Council is doing a Trunk-Or-Treat Downtown.”
“We’re handing candy out there, but it's supposed to be over by seven. Do you remember Sophie from high school? She’s supposed to bring her little boy, Damon, over after they get done trick or treating. I didn’t know if you wanted to see her and catch up for a little bit.”
I raise an eyebrow at her and she smacks me on the shoulder, laughing.
“I’m not trying to set you up with her! Christ, Jericho. She just moved back to town and she’s been bringing Damon into the library after she picks him up from school.” Mom has been volunteering at the library for the past few years. She claims it's because she gets bored sitting at home but I know it’s because of her secret love for books. She sucks at keeping secrets anyway. The amount of times I’ve walked in on her reading a romance and she’s tucked it under her pillow to hide away is comical.
“Is it cool if I bring the guys? We can have a small cookout. Hollis and Connor have been fighting over who’s your favorite, so if you could politely pick one so they’ll leave me alone, I would appreciate it.” Those two will bicker over anything and everything. And as soon as my mom does pick a favorite, whoever loses will try to rile up the other one just for shits and gigs.
“I amnotpicking a favorite. Besides, even if I did have a favorite, which I’m not saying I do, I wouldn’t tell them. I like all of your friends equally.” She nods her head definitively, proud of herself for her answer. I know it won’t be enough for Connor or Hollis, so we’ll have to see how they react when it comes time for them to confront her about it. I bet they’ll challenge each other to a duel. Last time they bet they could beat my dad in an arm wrestling match, not knowing that he had beaten Liam the day before when we had come over for dinner. Watching my dad smoke both of them was the highlight of my month, and watching them slink off to go lick their wounded egos in privacy away from us was the icing on the cake.
“Whatever you say mom. We’ll be back in a little bit. Is it cool if Raiden comes over later, too?”
My mom nods, but her eyes and lips are tight as she looks at me. Worry lining her features.
“We’re fine mom, he’s going through a lot and we have boundaries. We’re just friends, and it's going to stay that way.”
She doesn’t look convinced, and I’m not sure I convinced myself, but that’s how it has to be. Raiden has hurt me too many times for me to bury the hatchet, the same one he’s embedded in my back time and time again. The hatchet might be out, but the wounds are still healing. And maybe they always will be, I’ll hold a special place in me for all of the fun times we had together and mourn the space between us now.
“Be careful,” she says, pulling me into a hug and squeezing my shoulder. Her meaning comes across loud and clear. She doesn’t mean on the bike, she means with my heart.
