She left the door open.
This time only Bogdan and Tau remained outside.
Tau didn’t look me in the eye. He stepped forward and quietly closed the door.
I scowled at her unfinished plate. Additional nutrients that could have nourished my child, left on the table because she wanted to make a point.
I could bring her down a peg or two. Easily. All in good time.
I worked my way through the rest of my dinner with a slow deliberateness I didn’t entirely feel, refilling my wine glass once, the dining room holding its silence around me.
The thoughts in my mind grew louder with every bite.
??????
Another two weeks and her stomach was still flat.
I stood at the window with my black tea, watching her through the glass. The garden had come further into itself since the last time I’d paid attention—the bare branches filling out, the flowerbeds beginning to show colour at the edges, the lawn greening up properly after the last of the frost. Chernograd in spring had a distinct quality to it, reluctant and then sudden, as though the city had been holding its breath and finally let go.
Iskra was laughing at something Spartak had said. Her blonde hair caught the afternoon light. She looked—easy. Unguarded in a way she never was inside the house. The blonde-hairedbykiwas stepping over the line.
Tau would be watching from somewhere. I shouldn’t feel what I was feeling.
But I’d had a taste of her and I knew how good she was. My first bareback ride. I groaned and took another sip of tea.
The door opened behind me.
“Is everything all right, Pakhan?” Bogdan asked.
“Don’t ever get married,” I told him, keeping my eyes on Iskra.
A pause.
“You don’t need to tell me that, Pakhan,” he muttered, and the door closed again.
Tau appeared from the far side of the garden and fell into step behind them. Before he disappeared from view he glanced back over his shoulder and looked directly at me for a moment—unhurried, unreadable—then was gone.
In a few weeks the scan would show the baby’s vitals. I would be there for it. I circled the rim of my crystal glass and stared at the empty garden.
Then I would make her pay.
Chapter 34
Iskra
As the days passed my inner torment grew in leaps and bounds.
Not having Vadim in my space helped me focus. It reminded me of my purpose—and every day that purpose was growing a little more inside me. Quietly. Without permission.
He could divorce me.
Cut me off from my child.
At any time.
For no reason.
Clause 10 didn’t require a reason. It didn’t require anything from him except a decision. The child would be his from the moment it drew breath and I would have whatever access he decided to grant me, which could be none, which could change on a whim, which was entirely and permanently beyond my control.
