I don’t think he’s thinking about Die Hard right now.
Butterflies took flight in my stomach.No.Fireworks.Definitely fireworks.I swallowed roughly, my mouth suddenly dry, and my panties suddenly not.Fanning myself with a napkin, I asked, “Is it warm in here?”
Liam smirked.“No, Pipsqueak.It’s a perfectly normal temperature in here.Right, Carter?”
Carter glanced up, his little eyebrows drawn in confusion.“Auntie MyMy, it’s not hot.See?I gots a sweater on.‘Cause it’s cold.”
I chuckled.Kids were so innocent.“You’re right, buddy.My bad.”
“S’okay,” Carter mumbled, turning back to his game, already tuning us out.
I narrowed my eyes.“I owe you a death threat for that last ‘Pipsqueak’, but not in front of the kid.”
Liam grinned and took a drink of his coffee.“I’m okay with another rain check.You can get me twice next time.”
“Liam, dear.”Mrs.Patterson appeared next to our booth and patted Liam’s arm.“I wasn’t aware you were such close friends with our Maya here.It’s nice to see her out and about.”She leaned in, dropping her voice to a dramatic stage whisper.Oh, no.I don’t think I’ll like where this is going.“Poor girl hasn’t had a lover for as long as we’ve known her.”She winked.“Maybe you can help her get back on that—” Her gaze flicked to Carter at the last second, and she swapped out whatever scandalous word she was going to say for “—horse?”
I choked.Again.
Liam, the traitor, grinned.“Don’t you worry, Mrs.Patterson.”His voice dropped an octave as he looked directly at me and added, “I’ll make sure she’s riding again in no time.”
My jaw dropped.I can’t believe he said that.
I waited until the Pattersons were safely out of earshot before hissing, “What the hell are you doing?You can’t tell people that!”
Liam leaned back in the booth, totally unruffled.“Why not?You should see the stuff Mrs.Patterson writes in the margins of her spicy books.”
I narrowed my eyes, confused by his sudden change of subject.“What does that have to do with anything?”
“Trust me.There’s nothing I could say that would shock them.”He grinned.“That copy ofHot Dudes, Hotter Planetshe lent me has so many dicks drawn in it I’ll need to bleach my eyeballs.Did you know she draws tiny dicks instead of arrows to call attention to phrases she likes?And don’t get me started on Mr.Patterson’s sketches.”
Carter looked up from his game.“Dick means penis.Mom says it’s important to use the ‘rect word for privates.The ‘rect word is penis and testicles and vagina and vulva and anus.K, Liam?”he announced before tuning us out again.
Liam choked on a startled laugh.“You’re absolutely right, Carter.Thanks for reminding me.”
I shook my head at the impromptu anatomy lesson.Carter was full of surprises.
“None of this means I want them to know all of my business,” I said when Liam finally turned his attention back to me.“I kind of want to keep my private life private.”
Liam arched an eyebrow.“Maya, you must know how fast gossip travels in a town like this.Everyone already knows I spent the night with you.”
I spluttered.“What?How?”
He gave me a look.“For one,” he said, holding up a finger, “I’m staying at the Patterson’s B&B.”
Shit.That’s right.They must have noticed he hadn’t come back last night.
“And for another”—he held up a second finger—“they were spying on us through the window when we left the store this morning.”
“Oh…” Right.Well, there went any hope I had of keeping this a secret past lunchtime.Not that it needed to be a secret, but I certainly didn’t need everyone in my business either.
Andie chose that exact moment to return, placing Carter’s pancakes, already cut into bite-sized pieces, in front of him.She set another plate in front of Liam.“Pancakes for you.”Then, with a barely contained smirk, she slid mine in front of me.“And for Maya—amajesticsausage and pepper omelette with cheese.”
“Thanks.This looks grea…” The words died in my throat as my brain struggled to comprehend just what it was I was looking at.
It was an omelette, sure.But it was no ordinary omelette.
Instead of the regular-sized half-moon shaped omelette I usually got, what I had in front of me was enormous and bore a remarkable resemblance to a part of human anatomy.Expertly crafted from the finest ingredients, complete with strategically placed toasted poppy seed bagel halves.
