Her legs wrap around my waist, and I’m pinning her against the wall before I realize I’m doing it. Phoebe’s hands are gripping my hair and it hurts so fucking good I thrust into the cradle of her legs, her heat reaching me clear through the thickness of both of our pants.
This. This is what’s been missing from my life.
“More,” she whispers. “More, Archer.”
I slide my hands to her ass and squeeze, grinding my dick into her heat, and I kiss across her cheek and down her neck, sucking her sweet skin into my mouth, grazing her with my teeth before laving the mark with my tongue. Phoebe’s resultant panting breath in my ear is the sweetest sound I’ve ever heard.
“Are you guys almost done? Everyone wants pie.” Phoebe scrambles out of my grip when Charlie’s voice cuts through the fog of lust, her face adorably red.
With my back to Charlie, I adjust myself in pants and Phoebe’s eyes darken, her breath catching in her throat. I bend low and whisper in her ear. “We’ll talk more about that later.”
“It’s about time, Santa. I’ve been waiting patiently for ten minutes while you tied to suck my sister’s soul out through her mouth. Help me serve this pie, Phoebe.”
I smirk and walk from the kitchen straight to the bathroom to get myself under control. Phoebe’s kisses are even hotter than I remember, and my dick is going to need more than a few minutes to calm down.
And I’m going to need a little time to figure out why on earth Phoebe would believe that Annabelle was my girlfriend. Because that ship sailed long ago.
Chapter 33
Oh. My. Santa.
Phoebe
“Whatthehellwasthat?” Charlie hisses as soon as Archer is out of earshot. “I thought he had a girlfriend?”
I can’t stop the grin from taking over my face. “Turns out he doesn’t,” I say, my voice teetering on the edge of hysteria. “I was yelling at him about how I refuse to be the other woman when he told me there wasn’t anyone else. Then all of a sudden, he was kissing me.”
And boy, did he ever kiss me. I think I destroyed yet another pair of panties if the wetness between my legs is any sign. As soon as I can sneak away, I’m changing them. And taking a minute to calm the tingling in my belly before I float away from sheer giddiness.
Charlie snickers. “From where I was standing, it looked like a little more than just kissing,” she says while putting slices of pie onto plates. “He was grinding you into the wall. I know it’s been a while for you, but you must recall simple kissing rarely requires that much contact in the downstairs region?”
Remembering the way Archer pressed himself against me sends another flood of heat to my core, and if I didn’t need to get these panties off before, I absolutely do now. How hot was it when he scooped me up like that? I wouldn’t mind a lot more downstairs contact after that.
“Shut up.” I grab a tray from the cabinet and start loading it with the plates of pie. “We’re not talking about that.”
She snickers. “Oh? We’ll see about that.”
“Charlie. Please. Not now. I’ve had enough embarrassment for one day, don’t you think?”
The belly laugh that erupts from her sounds like it should have come from an enormous man instead of a tiny woman. The snort she makes in the silence following several deep-breathed guffaws sends me into my own fit of giggles.
“How could you not know?” she finally chokes out. “We’ve been to the adult store together. You know damn well what butt plugs look like.”
I wipe tears from underneath my eyes, forcing my giggles into submission. “I don’t know,” I huff. “When I look at them now, it’s all I can see. It’s like one of those optical illusions where once you figure it out, you can’tnotsee it. My brain refuses to see the innocent Christmas trees it once did.”
Charlie snickers. “Yeah. I don’t suppose you’ll be using them as decorations next Christmas.”
I frown. After all the fuss today, I probablyshouldn’tuse them to decorate again, but what a shame that would be. They’re just so darn pretty. I almost wish Webster had kept his mouth shut about them. Ignorance is supposed to be bliss, right? I would have been fine decorating with them every year if I’d never realized their true, naughtier, purpose.
But then I’d have gone on thinking Archer was some sort of real-life Santa Claus, with his own toy factory and everything. An image of him climbing down the chimney with a sack full of Christmas tree butt plugs, candy cane vibrators, and twinkle light nipple clamps flashes through my mind unbidden, and a hysterical giggle escapes my lips. I drop my head into my hands, my shoulders shaking with uncontrolled laughter. How is this my life?
“Okay, okay, okay.” Charlie pats the air with her palms down in a stopping motion. “Everybody calm down. I have an important question.”
From the way she’s biting her lips between her teeth, it’s clear that she’s fighting off another laugh. Whatever she’s asking is going to set her off again, I can tell.
“Do you think this revelation makes it more or less likely that he has a curved candy cane penis?” She splutters a laugh on the word penis and doubles over, holding her stomach. “Oh my god, it hurts.” She sucks in a stuttering breath. “I can’t…I can’t…haaaa… I can’t breathe.”
I snicker. I know for a fact his penis isn’t striped or curved, at least not as curved as a candy cane, but Charlie’s laugh is infectious and I can’t help but laugh right alongside her.
