Monday
I tell myself I’m here for the advice.
That’s the story I stick with as Sawyer and I sit at the corner table, two beers in, the low hum of The Silver Bit filling in the spaces where I don’t quite know what to say.
Sawyer’s got that easy calm about him tonight, loose shoulders, relaxed grin, the look of a man who’s figured something out and isn’t in a hurry to explain it.
Which is exactly why I asked him to meet me.
He’s one of Dakota’s men. He’s lived this thing I can’t stop circling. If anyone can tell me how to keep my footing while the ground shifts under me, it’s him.
But how can I get advice when the woman at the center of my storm isright here?
Abilene is near the bar, angled toward a woman I don’t recognize. The woman’s laughing, hand wrapped around a cocktail, posture relaxed in a way that suggests she belongs here, or at least knows how to pretend she does.
Abilene’s listening more than talking, shoulders a little tight, eyes flicking around the room, finding exits and people and noise levels all at once.
And she’s looking right at me.
This is stupid. I didn’t come here for her. I came here to talk to Sawyer. I came here to think.
My heart doesn’t care.
“You gonna talk, or what?” Sawyer says, dry and amused.
I drag my gaze away from Abilene.
“She’s here,” I mutter.
He doesn’t need clarification. Sawyer glances once over my shoulder, then back at me, mouth quirking.
“Ah.”
“That’s not helpful.”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You’re thinking it.”
“Correct.”
I take a long pull from my beer. It does nothing to slow my pulse.
“Okay,” I say, forcing my attention back where it belongs. “You said honesty matters. That you talk things through. How does that actually work when…” I pause, searching for the right words, “when it’s not one person. When it’s more.”
“We start with clarity,” he says. “Nobody’s guessing. Nobody’s assuming. And nobody’s pretending they’re fine when they’re not.”
I nod. “And jealousy?”
“That too,” he says easily. “We don’t treat it like a failure. We treat it like information.”
I absorb that. Roll it around.
Behind him, Abilene laughs.
My focus shatters.
Sawyer follows my line of sight again, then sighs. “You’re not actually here, are you?”
