I was fluffing the Spanish rice when Mal came through the front door.
“You’re just in time,” Judy called out. “Dinner is almost ready.”
I didn’t look up, but I could feel the weight of Mal’s stare as he took in the mayhem we’d unleashed in his previously pristine kitchen. Spanish rice, black beans, chicken tikka, shredded cheese, pico de gallo, and a spicy crema lined the countertops with varying levels of carnage of ingredients still strewn here and there.
“You guys actually cooked?”
I’d had so much fun buzzing around the kitchen with Judy. She was a hoot. We’d laughed and sang and told stories. It felt like I had a new friend.
But all that levity had been sucked out of the house with Mal’s return.
I could feel his glower from across the room.
It was so hard to reconcile this angry stranger to the man I fell in love with in Fiji.
Although to be fair, we’d only known each other a week.
“Maybe this was a mistake,” I murmured as I set the fork down with a soft click in the suddenly silent house.
“Saylor,” Judy rushed across the kitchen to awkwardly stand in front of me. I could tell she wanted to wrap her arms around me, but my body language was very clearly warning her off.“Don’t say something in the heat of the moment. You need to give the two of you some grace.”
I shook my head and took a careful step back from her. “No, I just—” I turned and faced Mal for the first time since he’d returned. “I get that you’re going through a lot. And I’m so sorry your friend died. But maybe this isn’t the best time to try meld two lives together. You’re going through a lot, and I’m avoiding a lot back home. Maybe this is just a case of right people, wrong time. Or hell, maybe it’s also wrong people. What the hell do I know?”
I looked at Mal, silently begging him to say something—anything—to give me the slightest hint that he felt different.
But he just stood there.
“Right. I guess it’s a good thing that I didn’t unpack. I’m just going to go grab my stuff. It was nice to meet you, Judy, and I’m so sorry for your loss. Gio sounded like a good guy. I’m sorry I didn’t get the chance to meet him.”
I rushed out of the room and headed for the main bedroom closet where someone had conveniently stowed my suitcases. I’d noticed them during Judy’s house tour. Maybe I should’ve taken pictures since it didn’t look like this was going to be my home after all.
I was vaguely aware of Judy’s high-pitched voice followed by Mal’s low drawl in the distance, but I didn’t stay to eavesdrop. I had to grab my stuff and figure out how I was going to get home. Uber to the airport and then… I didn’t exactly have a home anymore. Paige’s house, I guess?
I was hoisting a bag over my shoulder when Mal came into the closet—really it was bigger than Paige’s whole apartment in Vegas so calling it a closet was disingenuous.
Again, I could feel the heat of his gaze, but he stayed silent.
I jostled two bags closer together so I could grab them. “Maybe you could stop Samu from filing the paperwork, andthen we don’t even need to get an annulment. But if not, just send me whatever you need me to sign. I won’t block you or anything. So just text me for my address. I’m not exactly sure where I’ll land.”
“That’s it? You’re just going to end our marriage with a shrug and a ‘send me the paperwork?’”
“Right.” I slipped my ring off my finger and held it out to him. I loved it so much, but it didn’t feel right to keep it when our marriage hadn’t even lasted a week. “Here.” I waggled it in front of him when he didn’t make a move to accept it.
Mal scoffed. “You’re fucking unreal. I can’t believe you’re just walking out.”
“Are you serious? I get that today’s been hard for you—that your best friend died and you’re grieving—but have you even stopped for a second to see what today has been like for me? You ignored me the entire day. Aside from rescuing me from the paps at the airport, you’ve said all of three words to me today. I stayed in the car while you had appointment after appointment. You didn’t introduce me to anyone unless you were forced to. You left me with your driver most of the time. You foisted me off on your mom with barely a word. She was the one who showed me around your tomb of a home. I don’t even know where you’ve been for the last however many hours or who Caden is. You talked so much shit about my cooking I almost cried. I just…I don’t see the point.”
Mal gave a heavy sigh and stared at his boots. When he made no move to say or do anythingagain, I scoffed, set the rings down on the center display rack thingy, and loaded my bags onto my shoulders.
“Saylor, wait. I can’t…I don’t—” He groaned and scrubbed a hand over his face. “I’m shit with words. But you’re right. This has been a shit day. I’ve been a walking zombie since I heard about Gio. I’d like to say that it’s because I’m in pain, buthonestly I’ve been thinking about using again. I haven’t thought about anything or anyone else.”
My bags fell to the floor with a thunk. “Mal…”
I wanted to reach out to him, but he was throwing clear ‘don’t come near’ signals.
“It’s whatever. My endless struggle, I guess. And apparently, sometimes it turns me into an asshole. I used to be better at this whole balance thing, but this shit with Gio has just thrown everything out of whack. I don’t—I can’t—I don’t know what the fuck to do.”
Then I watched, stunned, as he fell to pieces in front of me.
