I force myself to keep it light.
NumberEleven: weird how?
LittleTooMuch: We’re on the same campus. Probably walked past each other a hundred times. You could be the guy who held the door for me at the library. Or the one who always takes the last blueberry muffin at the dining hall.
I snort.
NumberEleven: i would never take the last muffin. i have morals.
LittleTooMuch: SEE. That’s a clue. Haven’t you ever seenCriminal Minds? I’m building a profile. Just call me Spencer Reid.
NumberEleven: what do you have so far?
LittleTooMuch: Polite. Insomniac. Athlete—don’t deny it. You mentioned 6 a.m. practice once. Probably wouldn’t murder me if we met in person.
I stare at the wordathletefor a second too long. She doesn’t know it’s hockey. Doesn’t know it’s my senior year. Doesn’t know there are scouts in the stands sometimes, holding clipboards like they’re holding my entire life. She just knows I get up early and I’m tired all the time. It’s…oddly nice. Someone getting to know me before deciding who I am.
NumberEleven: “probably” is doing a lot of work in that sentence.
LittleTooMuch: Keeps me on my toes.
NumberEleven: you should. i’m extremely dangerous.
LittleTooMuch: Oh really?
NumberEleven: i even had cereal for dinner. pure chaos.
LittleTooMuch: Oh my god. You are a bad boy.
I grin at my phone like an idiot.
NumberEleven: what can i say? i live on the edge.
Her dots appear. Disappear. Reappear.
LittleTooMuch: What if we’ve already met?
I don’t answer right away, because I don’t know. Talking to her like this is easy. It’s words and a screen and the comfort of not having to perform. Real life is messy and loud and full of people who think they’re entitled to your best version all the time.
Still—
NumberEleven: would that be bad?
Her response comes fast.
LittleTooMuch: No, I don’t think so.
My chest warms at the simplicity of it.
NumberEleven: good.
A beat passes, and I worry I accidentally ended the conversation with my one-word caveman response, but then she sends:
LittleTooMuch: But also…kind of terrifying?
NumberEleven: haha yeah, just a little.
LittleTooMuch: Because right now, you’re the only person who doesn’t expect anything from me. I kind of need that.
