“Yeah. She’s been having a hard time with this Casey shit, and I think it might make her feel better.” I move to the top step and lean against the railing, crossing my arms overmy chest. “She said something today about wishing you were her dad.”
He swallows, blinking a few times. “Uh, yeah. If you’re sure, I uh…” Rubbing the back of his neck, he says, “I would love that.”
“You can’t back out if we tell her. If she knows you’re her dad, you have to be sure you’re one hundred percent in.”
He doesn’t hesitate. “I’m in. I’ve been in from the second I found out about her. Ash, I want to be her dad.”
My chest warms. This is the man I knew he was. This is the man I wanted him to be. This is the man I loved.
“Thank you for being there for her.”
“Always.” His hand drops from the railing, and he starts toward his bike.
I should let him go. There’s no reason he shouldn’t. So, why do I feel like I’m being shoved off this porch to stop him by a phantom wind?
“You know, it’s pretty late. If you wanted to, you could stay. I can sleep with Maggie in her bed.” I chuckle, feeling a little silly now that the words are spilling from my lips. “She’ll freak out if she thinks she got to have a sleepover with you.”
My cheeks heat.I just asked my ex-boyfriend to have a slumber party. What the fuck is wrong with me?
He smiles. “Okay.”
Maggie’s humming to herself while picking flowers to make herself a crown when Gabriel comes out tosit on the swing with me. Mornings are my favorite. I drink coffee and watch her play in the yard. It’s almost as if time stops when we’re out here with the sun on our faces.
“Morning. Coffee?” I ask.
“Found some.” He holds up a cup. “So, what’s your plan for the day?”
I shrug, gesturing to our daughter. “This.”
“Do you mind if I stay for a little bit? I don’t want to overstep if this is your time with her.”
“I’ve had five years with her. If you want to stay, stay.”
He’s quiet for a beat before saying, “I wish I could take it back. I know I’ve said it already, but every time I look at her, that’s all I can think.”
I grab his hand. “Me too.”
His eyes are fixed on her. “I think the hardest part is that I know if I’d made a different choice, we could have been really happy. I just wish I could’ve been there for all of it. To get up with her at night, and help her learn how to ride a bike, and all the other small things. Sitting here watching her, I know there’s nowhere I could be that would make me happier.”
He flicks his attention to me when he finishes, and tears prick my eyes.
“If it helps, she actually doesn’t know how to ride a bike yet. You can do that if you want.”
He nods, his mouth spreading to a wide grin. Eventually, Maggie drags him across the yard to push her on the swing. I cross my legs under me and open my book.
One chapter in, footsteps fall on the path that wraps around the house before Casey appears with a scowl.
“What’s this?” he asks, nodding toward Gabriel and Maggie.
“What do you mean?”I close the book.
“You didn’t tell mehewas coming today.”
I don’t particularly care for his tone. “I didn’t realize I needed to. Also, you didn’t tell me you were coming today either.”
“I figured you’d tell me if you were planning on letting a criminal hang out with our daughter.” Cocking his head, he leans his forearms on the railing.
Is he kidding right now?
