“She’s perfect,” he chokes out.
“Yeah, she is.”
After finding a more recent photo, I hold it out to him next. “That’s from the first day of school.”She’s in a pink dress with little black Converse sneakers. “Ignore her hair. It’s always a mess.” She’s got my curls, and for the life of me, I can’t seem to keep them from looking like she’s been rolling on the floor.
“Her teachers adore her. But they always comment on how much she talks in class.” I chuckle because the kid gets it honest.
He smiles for a moment before rolling his lips under, blinking.
When the gnawing in my chest still doesn’t cease, I add, “I can send them to you if you want.”
“Thanks.” He leans back on his palms and lifts his face to the sky. “I’m sorry you had to do it alone.”
“I wasn’t alone. I mean, it felt that way at first, but I had Jess and Gran. My mom’s been really great with her. She’s a way better grandma than she was a mom. Eventually, we had Casey, and sure he’s been shitty lately, but he was good while we were together.”
“I’m still sorry.” He runs his tongue over his teeth. “I’m sorry it wasn’t me.”
My shoulders sag, and I whisper, “Yeah, me too.”
Over the years, sometimes I’d wish he were there or wonder what our life would’ve been like if he had been. Sometimes I’d break down and convince myself to call him again, but I couldn’t.
He wipes a tear from my cheek. “I’m so proud of you, Ashton.”
39
GABE
AUGUST PRESENT DAY
I’m on my way to officially meet my daughter.
The majority of the last two weeks have involved me reliving the poor choices I made six years ago, beating myself up over them, and wallowing. But JT’s right. I can’t change any of it. If I don’t get my shit together, I might miss out on more. That might actually kill me. Now that I know, she’s all I think about.
I pull up outside Jess’s house and hop off my bike. Casey’s standing at the bottom of the stairs in a gray suit talking to Ash and smiling.
When she notices me, she pops up off the step she was sitting on.She’s in a T-shirt and denim shorts. It’s funny, she doesn’t look all that different from the girl that opened the front door that first summer I met her.
“Hey, you’re early. Casey was just dropping Maggie off.”
I nod at Casey and hold out a hand, trying not to grind my teeth. Obviously, part of me is grateful he was here for them, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous.
“Hey, man,” he says, his jaw ticking as he takes my hand.
I’m not the one who got to raise your kid. Chill the fuck out.
He wraps an arm around Ash. “I’ll call you later.”
Placing a hand in his suit pocket, he trots across the yard to his fancy-ass car.
Yeah, I still don’t fucking like him.
“He seems like a douche,” I joke, watching him leave.
Ash laughs, swatting my arm. “Be nice. He’s trying.”
“Trying what? To get back in your pants? I can see that.”
She cocks her head and smirks. “No. He’s trying to do the right thing.”
