“It might.”
“Alright, well,ifthat ever happens—which it very likely won’t—I’ll be honest with you about it. How’s that?”
“Yes. Perfect.” Cassian captured his mouth in a kiss and then shoved James backward. “Now, let me finish what I started.”
Chuckling, James began to roll over but stopped. He considered whether or not he ought to propose something else to Cassian instead.
“Do you want . . . more, though?” he asked.
Cassian was quiet for a moment, and then James heard the sound of the blankets rustling.
“Are you asking me if I want to fuck you?” Cassian asked, as bluntly as ever.
Hearing Cassian say those words made James’s stomach flutter for a second time.
“Yes,” he breathed. “Yes, that’s exactly what I’m asking.”
Suddenly, Cassian’s lips were on his, the kiss fierce and hard and filled with passion. James tried to match Cassian’s intensity, kissing him back with equal fervor.
James’s mind started to work to figure out how they could make it happen. Unfortunately, Cassian probably didn’t have lubrication here in his stateroom. Tomorrow, James could probably find something in the kitchen. Cooking oil, maybe, or even butter in a pinch. But tonight, they’d have to resort to saliva. It wouldn’t be a problem. James was no stranger to using it. But he’d have to be relaxed enough when Cassian penetrated him.
He broke their kiss.
“Are you comfortable with me, uhm, explaining things to you? I’d be happy to explain how we can make sure that I’m... ready, for instance,” James said. “Ready for you to fuck me, I mean.”
Cassian kissed him again. Afterward, he buried his face in the crook of James’s neck and began to kiss him there, too.
“You can tell me, James,” Cassian said between kisses, his voice soft and low, as though he could barely bring himself to admit to his inexperience, even only through implication alone.
Moving his hand through Cassian’s hair, James pressed a kiss to the top of his head and then sat up to flick on the reading lamp that was mounted above the bed. After hiking up his bed shirt a bit, he moved to settle back on the mattress but froze the moment he saw Cassian.
Cassian’s hair was a mess, completely mussed with pieces sticking up every which way. His beautiful brown eyes still seemed somewhat sleepy, his eyelids heavy looking. And with the first two buttons of his nightshirt unfastened, James could see some of his chest hair, too.
He looked perfect.
“Oh, God, Cassian,” James said through a contented sigh. “Are you really mine?”
“No.” Cassian smirked. “You’re mine.”
Staring lovingly into Cassian’s eyes, James felt his lips curl into a lopsided smile.
“Even better.”
Keeping his shirt lifted, James lay on his back and curled his legs, bringing his knees to his chest. Knowing that Cassian might find it a little less embarrassing to beshown, rather than told, James found Cassian’s hand and brought it to his lips. He took two of them into his mouth.
Cassian chuckled. “Does licking my fingers somehow relax you?”
James laughed a bit too. He brought Cassian’s fingers to his hole and pressed one of them to the opening. Understanding flashed in Cassian’s eyes, and his smile faltered.
“One at a time,” James whispered.
Cassian searched James’s face for a moment before pushing his finger in. James sucked in a breath through his teeth and made a littlemmfphsound. Cassian stilled.
“Sorry,” James said, his face warming. “It’s, uhm, been a while. Sometimes it’s like I forget the, ah, the sensation.”
“I’m not hurting you, am I?” Cassian asked.
“Not at all. Keep going.”
