What troubled her most was not the reflection itself – or not entirely – but the knowledge that he was aware of it.
That Mr. Darcy should know she had spoken of him – spoken freely – sat ill with her pride. It was not that she valued his judgement, she told herself; she simply disliked having given him cause to judge her at all.
She had never feared censure where she believed herself right. And yet, in this moment, she felt a faint mortification in the thought that she had not been sufficiently guarded.
She spoke when required, and with propriety; yet she was conscious that her usual ease had deserted her, and she could not wholly recover it.
Darcy, catching her silence and misreading its cause, supposed it merely the natural consequence of her cousin’s behaviour, and reproached himself, in some small degree, for having been drawn into its correction. He did not attempt to engage her again; discretion, he thought, required distance rather than insistence.
Elizabeth raised her eyes at last and met his – briefly, composedly. It was not defiance, and not quite indifference either – but something steadier, and harder to dismiss. She smiled, as if to assure him that she was perfectly at ease.
But the ease she offered was not the ease she felt.
The company continued to converse, the interval lengthening before the arrival of the officers; yet something had shifted,quietly and irrevocably, in Elizabeth’s mind – not her opinion of Mr. Darcy, but her certainty of her own conduct.
Chapter 4
Civilities and Consequences
The sound that reached them was not the roll of wheels upon the gravel, but the sharper, more irregular rhythm of hooves. Mrs. Bennet turned at once.
“The officers!” she exclaimed. “I knew they would not disappoint us.”
Colonel Forster entered first, his manner easy and spirited, followed by Mr. Denny, whose bow embraced the room with cheerful confidence. Mr. Wickham came last.
Elizabeth smiled at him as he crossed the threshold. He was about to return it when his eye fell upon Darcy.
The change was immediate.
He checked himself, his colour fading, and for a moment stood as if uncertain whether to advance or retreat. The hesitation with which he resumed his step surprised Elizabeth, for he had assured her, not long ago, that it was not in his nature to avoid Mr. Darcy, nor to be intimidated by him. Instinctively, she turned to Darcy to observe his reception of it.
Darcy had followed her glance and now met Wickham’s look full and steady. His expression did not alter, but his lips pressed together with a firmness that admitted no doubt of his resolve.The exchange lasted no more than an instant – yet it was unmistakable.
Wickham turned partially away, placing himself closer to his colonel, and advanced no further in Darcy’s direction. The smile returned at once – practised, ready – and he addressed himself to those immediately before him with the same ease that had so lately won him universal regard. Yet Elizabeth, watching him now with a sharpened attention, perceived that he did not once allow his eyes to stray toward Darcy again.
Introductions followed. Wickham spoke readily to Mr. Bennet, to Sir William, to Colonel Forster – to all, indeed, but one.
Wickham’s attention remained fixed elsewhere, and the circle slowly re-formed. Conversation resumed, though Elizabeth found herself even less inclined to take part in it than before.
Darcy spoke to her again, as if the moment had passed without consequence.
“You have been remarkably hospitable,” he said. “Your mother’s table appears to have expanded with admirable speed.”
Elizabeth smiled, a little stiffly. “Longbourn is accustomed to accommodating its neighbours.”
“So I observe.” His tone was even. “Some gentlemen, however, acquire the privileges of intimacy with particular rapidity.”
She met his look at once. “Mr. Wickham is well liked. He has an engaging manner, and he is new to the neighbourhood. That is explanation enough.”
Darcy inclined his head slightly. “No doubt. Novelty is often persuasive.”
Elizabeth felt the remark more keenly than she wished. “If you mean to suggest that he sought an invitation improperly, you are mistaken. He was asked because we had need of numbers.”
“I make no such accusation,” Darcy replied calmly. “I only observe.”
She coloured faintly, annoyed with herself for having spoken so warmly. “You judge him harshly.”
“I do not judge him at all,” said Darcy. “I merely remark upon what is easily won.”
