“Why?” That question has haunted me for years. “Why didn’t she find me? Reunite me with Valen or, at the very least, tell me what was going on?”
Agent Lamott sits down across from me. “After Vivian went to retrieve you and Valen that night at ROS, some of Terra’s most stringent supporters vanished when she interrupted Valen’s beating. Vivian tried to locate them for over a decade.”
He crosses one leg over the other, his ankle resting on his knee. It puts me on edge. “That’s why she and Miriam kept Terra locked away. Vivian couldn’t trust that Terra hadn’t exposed Valen’s secret or that she wouldn’t use it as a bargaining chip if she went to jail. So they were hoping the drugs would not only keep her docile but would also wear her down—that she’deventually slip somewhere. Until that happened, the very best thing she could do for you was keep you hidden.”
I shake my head. “That wasn’t her decision to make.”
“It was the only choice she had,” he says sadly. “What I learned from Vivian is… Well, it’s something you would write about, Clover. Your parents thought entrusting Terra with ROS would give her purpose. Meaning they had no idea how far Terra’s ideologies had already twisted away from their mission. From Vivian’s records, Terra took something that started from a place of hope and rebirth, and turned it into something dark, something she could control. She started gathering followers, people who went against everything your father stood for. And then she started planning.”
“To kill my parents?”
“To take you.” His voice softens. “You and your money were always the goal, Cal—Clover. We don’t believe she meant for you or Brooks to be in that car though. She underestimated how much he loved you and your mother.”
I feel sick.
“We believe that Terra went after Edward Harrington, Valen’s father, for his money and connections as well. Both he and Valen were always a tool for her to use, not to be loved. She didn’t account for the whirlwind that was Vivian though.”
“Why did Terra escalate now though? In the last six months?” Roman asks. “Is it really as simple as my mother and Miriam passing away?”
“That’s…part of it,” Agent Lamott hedges. “It also appears that it took some…coercion to get her followers back.” He adjusts his cufflinks. “Terra’s delusions are even more warped now than they were all those years ago. She didn’t have the power she once had, so rebuilding her army took longer than she liked.”
“She did all of this because my father didn’t love her?” I mutter to myself.
“I think,” Agent Lamott says, “that it started from a culmination of things. A lifetime of feeling unloved was one of them, but I’m not a psychologist, and I’m not sure we’ll ever truly understand her thought process. That’s something you’ll have to come to terms with—the never knowing.”
I don’t want to talk about Terra anymore, and I clutch my arms to ward off the chill she still infects me with.
“What…” My stomach twists painfully. “What will happen now? Valen was just a child…” Oh, God. Is that why he’s here? He can’t hold Valen accountable for what he did as a child. Can he?
“Clover, take a breath.” Grant stands in front of me, his gaze pleading.
“No, Clover.” Agent Lamott says. “Valen didn’t know what he was doing, but that man sure has spent his life trying to atone for those sins anyway.”
What does that mean? I’m not ready to face Valen yet, but I’m not ready to lose him either. I didn’t think I had any more tears to cry. I was wrong.
“Did you find them?” Grant asks. “Terra’s benefactors?”
“We did,” Agent Lamott says. “Miriam was not without her faults, but she was dangerously smart, and she was loyal to a fault. With Terra in custody, it set off a…chain of events that led to a file showing up on an FBI secure line within an hour. Miriam programmed it to send upon one of two things—her publicized death or Terra’s incarceration. The wealth of knowledge that she and Vivian collected over the years will save a lot of people, and it started with a trail that led to Terra’s primary benefactor.”
“You make it sound so…easy.” But I know better. Nothing about this is easy.
“This is what we do, Clover,” Agent Lamott says gently. “We root around in the sewer until the rats land in our traps. I only wish Vivian had reached out sooner.” He pauses as Grant stiffens. “But I do understand why she didn’t trust just any agent.”
He meets my eye. “Even within my department, not everyone can be trusted, and you and Valen were too valuable to her to leave anything to chance.”
“What happens now?” I ask again. Agent Lamott watches me carefully, then stands and buttons his coat. “Terra will be held in a supermax facility. Her trial is being fast-tracked and will be off record. Any secrets about the O’Connells or Harringtons will die with her in solitary confinement.”
“But…why?” Nothing is this open-and-shut. There’s always a trap door somewhere.
“As I said, your father was a good man, Clover, and he was my friend. His love for you was fierce, and while I don’t agree with Vivian’s methods, I do believe that both of your families have been through enough.”
“That’s it? It’s just…over?”
“As far as you being safe, yes, it’s over. But this was the first loose thread in the sweater, Clover. I’ve learned that once pulled, the rest unravels quickly. Terra wasn’t the only opportunist out there, but with her incarcerated, we’ll begin the work of tracking down others just like her.”
“What about the other kids? The ones like me?” I ask.
He tilts his head to the side and studies me like I’m an equation he can’t solve, then a small, kind smile curls at the corner of his lips. “When Vivian and Miriam brought down ROS, Vivian took care of those children and families just as she took care of you by placing you with the Danforths. They’ve had access to therapy, education, everything she could think of to give them a fresh start.”
