‘Would it have changed anything?’
He looked horrified. ‘Of course. I would never have let you go through it alone. I know you’ll never be able to forgive me, but I’ll do anything to make this better, anything you want.’
She stiffened then pulled away. ‘There’s nothing you can do. Some things can’t be fixed. I’m going now, Bobby.’
‘Let me drive you.’
‘No. I’d rather get the bus. Better not waste the petrol.’
CHAPTER 42
After that Riva kept her distance. She saw him in the gallery but did everything she could to avoid them meeting again. Linda noticed she was behaving a little stiffly and took her aside.
‘I don’t know what’s happening to you, but you have to keep your mind on the job. A mistake by any of us can result in certain death for one of our pilots. You understand that, don’t you?’
Riva nodded.
‘Good girl,’ Linda added, not unkindly. ‘This war is hard on all of us. Did you lose someone? Is that it?’
‘In a manner of speaking.’
Linda patted her shoulder.
After that warning Riva kept her head down and thought of nothing but work.
A couple of weeks later, after the ‘Tally-ho’ had beencalled, one of the other plotters broke down in tears. Linda quickly ushered the girl out.
Riva turned to Tilly, a bright young woman of about twenty with bleached blonde hair. ‘What was that about?’ she whispered.
‘She’s married. Been having an affair with someone in the military. Linda’s going to have to let her go.’
Bobby instantly came to Riva’s mind.
‘The RAF can’t do anything about unmarried staff getting together when they’re off duty. But they won’t have this. Not the extra-marital affairs. Bad for morale. The man involved was a pilot and I heard he’s already been posted elsewhere.’
While the days melted into each other, the nights became more exhausting and even more severe. There were four watches with about fourteen women in each. An unbroken watch was kept for twenty-four hours of every single day. In the intense atmosphere of the plotting room, men and women worked closely together. Lives depended on everyone getting things right and emotions were more highly charged than under normal circumstances. Off duty they let off steam together.
Riva and everyone else who worked in the war rooms had a special pass to show the military police if they were stopped at night. They had to be so careful. You couldn’t light a cigarette outside, and all the streetlights were permanently shut down. The nights were black as pitch.
Dances were held in the afternoons, between three and six, but Riva rarely went. Leave it to the youngsters, shethought. She liked to walk, though, always staying aware of where the nearest air raid shelters were. They used railway tunnels, cellars, basements, and openings in the sandstone cliffs which were riddled with passages and tunnels, formed over the centuries.
It was on one of these off-duty walks in the Upper Barrakka Gardens that she bumped into Bobby again. Though ‘bumped’ was not quite the word. She saw him coming before he saw her, and she momentarily froze. When he did see her, he paused then began to walk towards her slowly, carefully using his stick. Her heart melted and she bit her lip to suppress tears that had suddenly appeared from nowhere.
‘Hello, Riva,’ he said, and he smiled, looking so forlorn she held out her hand. She hadn’t meant to. It had happened involuntarily.
He took her hand.
‘Shall we sit?’ she said. ‘I mean your leg …’
‘Yes. I can’t walk so far these days.’
‘Does it hurt?’
‘Now and then.’
But she saw him wince as they reached the bench and he bent his leg to sit.
‘Oh Bobby,’ she said.
