She felt like howling, but didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing he had been successful. In a way she didn’t blame him, for she had hurt him and now it was his turn to hurt her. She forced herself to stand tall. Just as Jay was with her in every breath she took, she realized Indi had been too. She wondered how she could have been so blind.
‘Are you all right?’ Clifford said quite kindly, though nothing could pacify her now.
She turned on him, speaking angrily. ‘Why didn’t you tell me before?’
‘I didn’t want to hurt you. Truly. I genuinely cared for you.’
‘I’m not made of glass.’
‘She’s illegitimate. You could hardly have been friends, let alone sisters.’
Eliza sat down again. ‘I always wanted a sister. All my life I wanted a sister.’ And then she remembered what her mother had said about turning thedirtychild away. Her mother had turned Indi away; her father had been unfaithful. It was all true. Every accusatory word her mother had spoken had been true. Eliza had been ignoring Clifford as she thought this, but now, remembering what Dev had told her, her skin prickled.
‘Indi is not the only secret you kept from me, is she, Clifford?’ she said in an icy voice.
‘I don’t know what you mean.’ He replied in an offhand manner, and now he picked up some secateurs that had been lying on the grass and began trimming a nearby bush.
The burst of her own anger shook her. ‘For Christ’s sake, can’t you be honest for once! You knew Dev’s father was the one who threw the bomb that killed my father. That was why Dev agreed to help Chatur. He was frightened the truth would spread. He was frightened for his father.’
He paused for a moment and then his voice became more serious. ‘I only wanted to protect you, Eliza. What good would knowing that have done? We had never been able to find the man.’ He spoke calmly, as if the words were well rehearsed.
‘And as for Indi, it wasn’t up to you to decide.’
‘I promised your mother.’
‘And yet you arranged for me to come here, knowing Indira was here. Why did you do that?’
He didn’t reply for a moment and looked nervous. ‘I saw no reason for you to ever find out.’
‘So who else knows? Indi obviously, but what about the others? Are they all laughing at me?’
He spoke, eyes down, his brow furrowed. ‘I would never have let that happen. Nobody knows, Eliza. I promise you that. Indi only found out recently. Just before her grandmother died she told Indi the truth.’
Eliza did not reply, but glanced up at the darkening sky and then bent forward, head in hands. It really was too much to take in. She didn’t know how to feel about Indi, and had absolutely no idea how to deal with it either. She felt locked up inside and, needing to protect herself from such unfamiliar feelings, she felt the wall around her grow even more solid. She looked up. The garden had seemed so pretty, light and breezy; now it had become a place of shifting shadows.
She saw that Clifford was watching her. His face had changed and his stiff manner had softened.
‘Was I really here to take photographs for the archive or was I an unwitting part of a conspiracy to spy on the royal family?’
‘For the archive, of course. I have all your final prints. I’ll have the ones you choose sent up for framing and then they’ll be delivered to wherever you like. Will that suit? And if you wish to complete the project then it will all be archived.’
‘Thank you.’
‘The prints will be at Dottie’s. I don’t imagine you’ll be wanting to spend time here.’
‘I must give you back the Leica.’
‘No. It was a gift. I have no use for it.’
‘That’s very generous. Thank you. I’ll repay you one day.’
He reached out a hand. ‘Eliza …’
She shook her head. ‘Don’t come any closer.’ If he said one more thing now she knew she would cry, so she got to her feet and very slowly and deliberately walked out of the garden.
Back at Dottie’s the cases were being loaded up to be taken to the station. Dottie had put on her hat and came running across, calling out as she did.
‘We are just leaving – did you get the address from Clifford?’
