Just like me.
I need him.
Ineed him.
I needhim.
I’m not a virgin by any means, not…anymore. After Mickey took my innocence and tried to use the threat of doing it over and over, I took matters into my own hands. I found a guy that seemed nice–and a little too much like Ty–at the local high school, and tried to erase every single touch of Mickey. The guy and I didn’t work out, not once he realized who I was and who owned me, but it made Mickey leave me the fuck alone. Unless I lost a fight.
That… That was a different story.
That all being said, I didn’t think I’d ever find myself wanting to do it. Sex has always been a power move. Some weapon in my arsenal. Mickey was getting a littletooclose? One night stand with someone I choose because it would disgust him enough to leave me alone.
I would fuck sommeone random–safely of course; condom and pulling out, there’s no fucking way I was going to take that chance, ever–and it would keep a darker evil at bay.
I’ve had the whole emotional intrinsic discussion about if what I was doing was good or bad, but I was just surviving. And if that makes me a whore? So fucking be it.
I’d take being a whore over what Mickey wanted to do to me any day of the week. I had control with those other guys. They just wanted to fuck and leave, but with Mickey it wasn’t and would never be like that.
With Ty…
Oh god, with Ty, I know it’s going to be everything. Everything I’ve ever wanted. Needed. Hoped for. Longed for. Fantasized about.
He’s going to ruin me and I’m gladly going to hand myself over. I’m already his, so this last step, it’ll just solidify the deal.
Ty’s mine.
Always has been and always will be.
“If you keep sucking marks into my skin, I’m going to return the favor,” Ty growls and I pull back, realizing that my soft sucks turned into full devouring. He’s got a beautiful purple mark on his neck.
Mine.
“I can’t wait,” I say softly.
The muscle in his jaw ticks as he slows down his speed, and grumbles, “Fucking finally” under his breath. He takes the steps two at a time and before I know it, Ty’s dropping me right by the door and shoving his key into the lock with an intensity that I’m surprised didn’t break the key.
“In. Now,” he orders, taking my hand and pulling-dragging me into his apartment before turning and locking the door behind him and shoving a chair under the knob.
I want to laugh at the additional measure, but I’m so fucking turned on by it.
That he’s as far gone for me as I am for him.
Ty turns to face me; pupils blown, eyes wanton with want, his lips are parted just slightly as he looks at me with this edge that I know I’ve pushed him to. An edge that he’s so willing to jump over that there’s not one bit of his usual mask up. I can see everything he’s thinking, everything he’s imagining.
And I fucking love it. I always want this kind of openness from him from now on. I can seeeverything.
Right now? He’s looking at me like if he doesn’t get his hands, his lips, his body on mine, he might die.
I get it, big guy.
“Come here,” I growl, pulling him into me with a yank of his shirt and he crashes into me.
Like he was waiting for permission from me to give in.
“Fuck yes,” he moans into my mouth as I swallow the rest of his noises. His hands, that are as big as my freaking head by the way, thread into my hair. He’s gentle about it, more gentle than I thought he’d be with this amount of need running between us. Ty pulls back for a moment, and his hand moves from the back of my head to cup my cheek gingerly. “Wait, we don’t have to do anything. I would be happy just holding you like this. This, you with me, is all I need, Roxie.”
My heart stutters because I can see how much he means every damn word. I could pull away from him right now, and he’d still hold me. I could tell him I’m not going to ever want sex, and he'd tell me it was fine, he doesn’t need sex as long as I’m next to him.
