“I just want to apologize again.”
Papa offers me a grunt and walks over to the intercom, calling his secretary inside. I take this as a signal that my time with my father is over. I mutter a quick goodbye, then make my escape. It hurts that he doesn’t ask for his customary kiss on the cheek, but I know he needs some time to calm down.
As I disappear out of his office, his words echo loudly in my mind.“I’m extremely disappointed in you.”A stray tear escapes the corner of my eye. I know I have no one to blame but myself. I’ll learn from this mistake and hope I can prove to Papa I can make something out of this.
By Saturday,my mood has improved, but I’m still holding massive waves of guilt inside me. The weather is bright and sunny on this late June afternoon. I’m inside an open-top carriage, seated opposite Amanda and Clara. As we pull out of Buckingham Palace, there’s a deafening roar. The streets are brimming with tourists hoping to catch a glimpse of us as we leave the palace for Horse Guard’s Parade.
Waving to the crowd, I do my best to place a pleasant smile on my face, despite wishing I could be anywhere else. “I’d give anything to be on a horse like Papa, Eddie, and David. They’re so lucky. They don’t have to smile. They can focus on their horses. Not to mention, they won’t be criticized for what they’re wearing.” I glance down at my light-blue chiffon gown.
Amanda chuckles. “Now that you’re almost twenty-one, I’m sure your dad will give you some type of honorary military appointment. Then you can ride out with the boys in uniform. But if you ask me, events like this are much more fun when you’rewithpeople. Not riding solo.”
“If it makes you feel any better, I can tell you that David wasnotlooking forward to being on horseback today,” Clara says.
“Neither was Eddie,” Amanda adds.
Clara fans herself. “In heat like this, we’re lucky we don’t have to wear those woolen tunics and tall bearskin hats too.”
“I suppose you’re right.” My gaze travels to the members of the guardsmen lining the Mall who salute us as our carriage moves past them. They’re wearing the traditional summer-order scarlet tunic uniforms.
“Which regiment will be trooping its colour today?” Clara asks. Her cheeks color. “I feel silly for not knowing this.”
“The second battalion Irish Guards,” I answer. “And you shouldn’tfeel guilty for not knowing. You’ve been busy.” I’m careful not to mention Amanda’s suspicions about her expecting.
“I know, but I don’t like to make excuses,” Clara says.
“Can I let you two in on a little secret?” I start, hoping to lighten the mood. The girls both nod. “Don’t tell anyone I said this, but Papa is a bit biased. His favorite regiment isn’t one of the footguard regiments. It’s the cavalry.”
“Because that was the division that he, Eddie, and David all served in?” Amanda guesses.
“Yup. His brother, my uncle Frank, is the odd one out in the family. He joined the navy.”
“And which division would you have joined?” Clara asks.
“Obviously the cavalry.” Amanda elbows her. “She’d keep the family tradition going.”
“Actually, no.” I fold my hands and set them on my lap. “Yes, I would’ve wanted to work with horses, but I would’ve wanted to make my own mark. If I’d joined the military, I’d have opted for the King’s Troop Royal Horse Artillery. No royal has ever served in their regiment.”
And it was something I seriously considered too. Becoming a member of the military meant that I would’ve been treated just like everyone else. I’d be able to do what I love, help care for horses, and serve my country. The only thing that stopped me was that when I considered the future, I saw myself being more fulfilled in the long-term by solving problems with different buildings and structures.
“Wow. I never knew that,” Amanda exclaims.
“Now you do.”
Suddenly, the carriage hits a rut in the road, and we’re jostled in our seats. My breath catches in my throat as I hit the side of the carriage. It stings, but I’ll be able to shake it off in a few minutes.
“Apologies, ma’am,” the driver calls out from the front. “Everyone all right?”
“I think so,” I answer.
Amanda and I recover quickly, but Clara grips the edge of the door with one hand and holds her stomach with the other. Her face pales and then turns a shade of green. “Ugh.”
I exchange glances with Amanda. I really hope she’s not going to be sick. Especially when there are millions of people watching.
“Are you okay, C?” she asks.
“I will be.” Clara closes her eyes and takes a few deep breaths. “I’m ultra-sensitive to certain smells and sudden movements these days. I might as well tell you two now. I found out two days ago that I’m expecting.”
“I knew it!” Amanda exclaims.
