“If either of you go to the bathroom, you won’t be allowed back in this house,” Blake grumbles.
Jamie’s brows shoot up. “That doesn’t seem very hospitable. What if I need to have a piss?”
Shay nods. “I also need to piss.” Then more quietly, to Jamie, he says, “Which bathroom has the lube in the soap dispenser?”
Jamie shrugs. “Pretty sure they all do.”
And in spite of Blake and Owen’s protests, the pair head off for one of the many bathrooms so they canrelievethemselves.
I shake my head in exasperation, letting out a sigh.That’sexactly the influence I need around my teenage kids.
“You know, I think it’s very sensible of you to keep lube so close at hand,” Sunny says, because she’s Sunny so of course she’s going to have a comment for that. “That’s something you should remember, Damon.”
I jolt at the sound of my name. “Excuse me?”Jesus Christ, does she know something? And what could she even know? There hasn’t been any call for lube use yet.
Wait…what the fuck?Yet?
“Women around your age often have trouble in that area,” she clarifies with a shrug. “I’m sure it would be appreciated if you came prepared… You know, I actually have a wonderful organic?—”
“Okay, I think I need a drink,” I announce, finally managing to break away from my mother’s orbit and stalk out of the living room.
5
I hearsomeone behind me as I’m digging through the fridge for a beer, and know instinctively that it’s Blake.
“I have to say, you held out longer than I thought you would,” he says wryly.
I slam the fridge closed and grab the bottle opener magnet from the door. “Could she possibly be any happier about the divorce?” I mutter as I snap the cap off my beer. “Single life suits you…sow your wild oats…It’s as though she’s been praying for this day since Valerie and I got married.”
The decision to split was a pretty amicable one, and while the grief stage was unavoidable for both of us, it didn’t last all that long. We’re still really great friends, we still love each other;we just happened to grow in different directions over the past twenty years and didn’t notice it happening until the kids were older and spending more time away from the house.
But just because I’m not a basket-case about the divorce doesn’t mean I need to hear my mother gushing about how great my life is now. I don’t regret my marriage despite how it ended; Valerie and I had a lot of really happy years together and two amazing kids. I wouldn’t trade that for anything.
“She’s just happy you’re here,” Blake says reasonably. “She’s missed you.”
I let out a derisive laugh and take a sip of my beer. “Oh, yeah. She’s definitely missed me—that must account for thezerotimes she’s visited me in the twenty-four years since she decided to take off without a word while I was away for the summer. But it’s cool ‘cause I didn’t need further mothering anyway.” I punctuate the sardonic spiel with a tired sigh, shaking my head. “Look, I know you just want everyone to get along and be a big, happy family and shit, and I promise I’ll try my best on days like today… but that’s about my limit.”
Blake’s expression is full of regret and disappointment; and I know I’ve let him down, which makes me feel even shittier than I already did. “I understand your resentment, Damon. I just really don’t want you to let that stop you from building an actual relationship with her. You’re both in the same city now?—”
I cut him off with a scoff. “Sure, we’re both herenow.But how long do you think that’ll last? Why the fuck would I even bother when odds are she’s just going to flake again?” I swallow the last swig of my beer and stride over to the recycling to toss the bottle. “But who knows? Maybe if I ever get married again she might deign to leave whatever wellness retreat-tantric sex lodge-peyote crack circle thing she’s at and actually put in an appearance. We can do some awesome mother-son bonding then.”
Blake sighs. “D?—”
I shake my head and hold a palm up as I back toward the door that leads into the hallway. “I just need a breather. I’ll be fine for dinner.”
Fuck, I need a distraction. I need to just not think about my mom and Blake and the past twenty-four years and the churning resentment I could have sworn I’d already let go of.
As I’m waiting for the elevator I tug my phone from my pocket, and before I can think better of it I tap out a text.
Me
Distract me
He must have his phone in his hand because a response comes through almost immediately.
Jazz Grimsay
Well this is a surprise dirty boy
