Killian and I stare at each other as we process our brother's words. He said he was never sexually violated, but we now know he was. Somehow this makes our father more of a monster. I don’t know how old the others were, but Carter was a fucking toddler. A baby. My heart fractures for my brother. The more we learn, the more it makes sense that he didn’t speak for so long.
There’s trauma, and then there’s what Carter experienced.I don’t even know the word for what our father did to him. It’s more than trauma.
Heather sits perfectly still, likely wanting to give Carter time. All three of the brothers sit across from us, two of them appearing heartbroken for Carter, but Psycho wears the same stoic expression he always does. I don’t think it’s because he doesn’t care. Maybe he has a resting bitch face.
Carter asks him, “Were you?”
Psycho shakes his head.
“No, he never touched me, but I’m older. He didn’t touch Bones or Kage either. I think he went after the youngest ones. Small children are the easiest targets. It’s sick, but it’s true. I was always expected to be the head of the family, so maybe that’s why. I’m not sure.”
Reaper rubs his hands down Bella’s arms. It’s clear that he’s as obsessed with her as we are with Heather.
“Do you have any other questions?”
Carter shakes his head before addressing Bella.
“I wish I had gotten the opportunity for revenge, but I understand why you did it. I’m glad he can’t hurt anyone else.”
Carter is as kind as he is capable of. Since the day we found out Frank was dead, it has gnawed at Carter. Men like us don’t forgive and forget. If you hurt us, you die. It’s something my brother needed to heal, but he’ll never get it. I think it’s why we understand Heather's need for vengeance the way we do.
“Are you okay?” I hear Heather ask Carter, and I’m relieved when he says, “Yes, Little Heathen. I’m fine, but it’s time to go. I need to get out of here.”
She quickly gets to her feet and runs over to hug not only Bianca, but Bella and Hadley too.
“We are going to go. Thank you so much for the yummy dinner.”
Raven and Bianca walk us to the door.
“Don’t forget. Bones will want to see the drawing tomorrow so he can set up extra guards.”
As he opens the door for us, Bianca says, “There’s an office in the guest house. Paper and pens are in the drawer.”
I nod as we walk outside.
“I’ll get it done.”
CHAPTER FIFTY-FOUR
KILLIAN
As we walk back to the guesthouse, I’m quiet as I contemplate how to talk to Carter, or if I even should. I’m seething after hearing what happened to him at the hands of our own fucking father.
“You need to spend some time with the bag,” Knox says quietly as Heather and Carter walk ahead of us.
“I’m fine.”
He grabs my arm and stops walking. Giving him a glare does nothing to make him back down from me as we stand toe to toe.
“You are not fine. Hearing that shit—neither of us are fine. The difference is I hide it far better than you do.”
He releases my arm but continues to lecture me.
“He is healing, Kill. She was touching him. We never thought that would happen. Either of us losing our shit could set him back. We need to be careful not to destroy what he has worked for. Anything we say could add to the shame. I know you don’t want to hurt him. Get your aggression out on the bag so he doesn’t see it.”
He stares at me, his expression stern, something I’ve never experienced from Knox.
“This is how you fucking make things right.”
