“You are bold to speak your mind to me so freely.” Weryn lifted an eyebrow.
Crossing his arms over his chest. “Ryder always wanted the truth. No matter what it cost him. How inconvenient it was. Especially if he was the cause of things going wrong. I’m giving you thehonorof speaking to you as I would to him.”
Weryn’s eyebrows kept lifting with every word. But he actuallysmiledat the end and clapped Demos’ back. “Bold! Brave! We shall see if your actions can live up to those words.”
“I’ve got your back. I always have. We’ll take them down,” Demos said with certainty.
“If you approve, I will touch your mind and we will find Legion’s location,” Elgar said.
“Do it,” Weryn grunted. “Let’s start this hunt.”
REGRET
“Close your eyes, Weryn, it will help you visualize where we need to go, where Legion is hiding,” Elgar said softly. “Your understanding of Legion and connection to this place will help me pierce Roan’s mind mask.”
The tall, spare figure dressed in ill-fitting clothes stepped in front of Weryn. Unstyled hair flopped in front of Elgar’s silver eyes and hung untidily over his shoulders, yet Elgar had a pretty face. Some would have called him “scholarly” or “diffident” with his gentle movements and downcast eyes. But there was a core of steel in him. Weryn could sense this. So he found himself obeying and shutting his eyes.
“Now empty your mind,” Elgar requested.
But this request was not so easy to comply with. Weryn found that was clenching his jaw and his mind was full. The anger he felt roiled within him like volcanic magma. Legion had to be destroyed! Roan/Kaly needed to be literally sliced into pieces so thin that one could see through them! And whoever was with them would die memorable Second Deaths so that no one would ever forget that to be his enemy–Daemon’s enemy–was a dreadful mistake!
If I do this then Daemon will forgive me,a small voice said in his head that sounded like his own.I can finally, truly go home. The War will be over.
For a moment, his whole psychequivered. It was almost as if those thoughts were stones that had been tossed into a still, mirror-like pond. The ripples distorted the perfect reflection and showed him that itwasa reflection, not reality. Was he a reflection? A dark one? What was real?
And as those ripples flowed outwards, he heard a voice that was like the one he spoke with now, which bubbled up inside of him,Daemon’s already forgiven me. He told me. Me and Grayson.
Daemon is asleep!
He’s not. Julian–his promised fledgling–came and woke him. I helped Julian shift for the first time. He was so sweet and eager. Strong and smart. Exactly what he should be. Daemon is in his palace. You can hear his voice if you just listen,that second voice insisted.
That’s impossible!
Why?
A simple question. It should have a simple answer. Facts. Clear and pure and devoid of self-interest. But that was not what came out of him.
He cannot yet be awake! I am not done! I have not redeemed myself!Again, this was said in his old voice.
A sigh.He understands. He blames himself for not being there. Whatever I did in the War was done out of rage and grief. I was not myself. I must make up for what I’ve done if I can. But hiding from reality is not going to fix anything.
No! Daemon’s sleeps! I have time to fix all of this!
Daemon’s awake and aware. He knows it all. I could not hide what I’ve done from him even if I wanted to,the first voice said sadly.I’ve only hidden it from myself and that hasled to this fracturing of my psyche. And that led to me hurting Grayson. Demos is angry and worried, too. Siban is beside themself. I must stop this.
You lie! Everything you say is a lie!
I’m not lying. I just want to escape what I’ve done now that I can remember it. Some of it anyways. Legion is a symbol for all my failures during the War,the first voice continued implacably.Knowing how I died, how Legion used my own rage against me, and realizing that they are behind this current threat to Daemon was too much for me. I wanted to retreat from the truth.
Shut up!
I’m you, Weryn. You’re me. Not some separate voice in your head. Not a different person or a second soul. There is no one else, but me here. I’m called Ryder now–
SHUT UP!
Weryn’s eyelids flew open. Elgar’s face was nearest to his. The Eyros Vampire’s brow was furrowed. His right hand was resting against the hollow of Weryn’s throat. One look into those incisive silver eyes told Weryn that Elgar had heard everything. Everything!
I dare you to comment on what you heard in my head, Eyros,he growled.
