“Why would I hide anything from you?” he says with a bewildered shake of his head.
“You tell me.” My eyes narrow. Is he stalling to come up with a convincing lie?
“Where is this even coming from?” He stares at me as though I might’ve hit my head on the bathtub.
“Will you stop asking me questions and answermyquestion?” I throw my hands up, losing my patience. “Just tell me the truth.”
He grabs his head with his hands. “The truth about what?”
“I swear I will strangle you if you ask me one more question,” I say in a vicious whisper. “I know you’re a being of the Shingae. Why have you been hiding it from me?”
Ethan freezes for a heartbeat, then bursts out laughing. “You have the oddest sense of humor, Sunny.”
I scan his face for signs of guilt, unease, or calculation—the signs of someone who is lying—but all I see are the traces of his laugh and a hint of worry in his eyes. Does he really not know who he is?
“I’m not joking, Ethan.” I enunciate carefully, not knowing what to think anymore.
He jumps to his feet, shaking his head. He spins left and right, pacing the small space of the room. I stand up and take a gentle hold of his hands. He turns his head away, his Adam’s apple working.Oh, gods.If he didn’t know, then I did a really shitty job of breaking the news to him.
“You didn’t know?” I cup his cheek and turn him to face me. “You had no idea?”
“Aboutwhat?” His voice breaks. “I don’t ... understand.”
“Maybe I don’t either.” The hurt and confusion on his face make my throat tighten with the threat of tears. I’m not sure how to explain, so I start at the beginning. “I’ve had my suspicions since you showed up in Vegas. I don’t know how, but you must have tracked my magic. I mean, how else would you know I’d be at Roxy’s Diner, of all places?”
“I pored over Ben’s notes, but I kept hitting dead ends. I ... I went to Las Vegas on a ... a wild hunch.” He pulls away to pace again with short, tense steps. “I couldn’t sleep that night, so I went out for a walk—to clear my head—but my steps led me straight to you. It was as though I couldfeelyou were there.”
“Didn’t you think that was weird?” I keep my voice level, even though he just confirmed that he traced my small burst of magic to find me. Something no one should be able to do. I tuck away that mystery to solve another time.
“I don’t know.” He stops at a wall and leans his head back against it. “I think I convinced myself that a good private investigator has to rely on his gut sometimes.”
“And the red assassin stabbed you,” I continue, moving on to the next piece of the puzzle. I hold up my hand when he opens his mouth to argue. “Iknowwhat I saw. She stabbed you, but her blade didn’tpierce you. Even when the blue assassin screeched that soul-shriveling scream, you didn’t bleed. And the wildflowers on the enchanted field didn’t cut you even though they slashed through me.”
“Red didn’t get me. You don’t remember clearly, because you were hurt.” Ethan pushes off the wall, warming up to the idea. “Her dagger only grazed my shirt. And ... and maybe Blue’s scream affects beings of the Shingae more strongly than humans. That’s why you bled, but I didn’t. It makes sense, doesn’t it? That’s got to be it.”
“What about the flowers?” I ask softly. He’s making the same excuses I had been making, but I can’t hide from the truth anymore. And neither can he.
“I was wearing these jeans, and ... and the flowers weren’t tall enough to reach my hands.” He comes to stand in front of me, wearing a taut smile. “See? You’re way off the mark, Sunny.”
Nothing I know about the Shingae can explain his seeming invincibility, but I know magic when I see it. And I don’t remind him about the mythical golden and silver axes—something I didn’t even believe were real until I saw them in his hands—appearing before him when he desperately needed them. Besides, I can’t explain their sudden appearance either ...
A memory claps through my head like thunder, and I remember how the lore of the woodsman ends.Ethan can wield the axes.My mind scrambles with the knowledge, its significance taking root.Oh, gods.I can’t begin to fathom what that means—what it means forhim. I clear my throat and meet his gaze.
“I’m sorry, Ethan.” I can’t tell him about the axes. Not right now. This must already be too much for him. It’s more thanIcan handle. Time to flex my avoidance muscles. “I can’t explain everything, but I’m afraid I got it on the nose.”
“No, you’re wrong,” he rasps, his smile dissolving. “I don’t know what makes you think I’m a being of the Shingae, but I’mhuman.”
“Only beings of the Shingae can see Samshin Halmeom. And you saw her,” I whisper, but Ethan winces like I’m screaming in his ear.Everything else could be explained away, but this is the incontrovertible truth. This is what finally convinced me that Ethan is a being of the Shingae. “Humans can’t hear the Seonangshin. But you heard her speak.”
Ethan backs away from me, shaking his head. My heart breaks for him. I know what it’s like to want to hide from yourself. My brows pull into a frown as a thought occurs to me. But if he doesn’t know who he really is, how is he hiding his true life force?
“I can’t sense your magic. Your gi is somehow hidden,” I murmur, thinking out loud. I link my fingers tightly together. “Orbound.”
Why would anyone bind his magic? Who even has the power to do that? But I see Ethan standing a few steps away from me, looking pale and haggard, and I pack up the questions for another time. Everything else can wait. I need to be here for him.
“I thought you were hiding your magic the way I had been,” I confess. “I thought that meant you knew you had powers. Even back when we were together in LA ... But you really didn’t know, did you?”
“Do I look like a man who knows the first thing about magic?” His laughter holds no humor. “You seriously think I havepowers? What powers? I was about to rush the blue assassin with rocks in my hands, for fuck’s sake. No, it can’t be true. Itcan’t.”
