“Because my cousin and I are growing fond of you. You have given her hope to reclaim her husband’s honor. I have not seen her this animated since before his death. I, too, want you to defeat Lady Middlebury.”
“Because?”
It was Mrs. Newsome’s turn to look away, her expression pensive as if she debated something. Then she said, “You will understand when you meet Lady Middlebury. My cousin makes excuses for her old friend, but the truth is, she is unkind. She isn’t a comfortable woman.”
Gwendolyn frowned, uncertain of what she meant, but then Lady Orpington called out, “Come, Vera. We must be leaving.”
Turning, Gwendolyn saw that Mr. Steele was already mounted. The horse was a bay without a touch of white. Mr. Steele was dressed in a black riding jacket and black breeches with black boots. This was the man she knew. One who liked to blend into the shadows.
And yet he appeared the perfect picture of a Corinthian and his beast. The horse pranced as if anxious to go. Mr. Steele held his seat, as relaxed as if the horse was standing still.
Of course he would be an excellent rider.
One more thing to admire about him.
At her shoulder, Mrs. Newsome said quietly, almost urgently, “Also, I, too, once loved a man who wouldn’t promise to commit to me. At the time, I believed I loved him enough for both of us. I knew he cared about me as much as he could any other person.”
“Did it work?”
“Well, he married me.”
“And?”
“I loved him. Although I don’t believe he was ever happy or content. Too many demons surrounded him.”
“Where did that leave you?”
“Here, doing my cousin’s bidding. He left me because I wasn’t enough.” Mrs. Newsome took Gwendolyn’s arm, and they started back to the coach.
When they were still not in earshot of the coach, Mrs. Newsome leaned close to Gwendolyn and whispered, “I always wished he’d been fully mine. I regret I did not choose more wisely. Commitment is important, Miss Lanscarr. Commitment is all. Remember that.”
Chapter Seven
Beck watched as the footman helped Mrs. Newsome and Gwendolyn into the coach to join Lady Orpington. Gwendolyn didn’t look at him, not even to nod hello.
That was what he had wanted, he reminded himself. He’d told her to keep her distance, and she was. He’d even chosen to see his own way to Colemore instead of riding with the ladies.
Yes, this was what he wanted...except he discovered he didn’t like it. He’d had a taste of Gwendolyn’s bright, inquisitive mind, and he found he wanted more. He’d spent the last week thinking about their conversation and replaying it in his mind.
The coach started forward. Beck’s intention was to ride ahead. Instead, he rode beside it. He could claim to be a guard, but they didn’t need one. Not with this many footmen, and not in Kent.
No, he rode beside the coach because Gwendolyn was there... and also because he couldn’t make himself charge forward. The reason for that was complicated.
Beck had known of Colemore since his school days. The Faircote headmaster was aware of his connection to the marquess. After all, the school payments had come from him. The headmaster had once mentioned the estate. Here was a connection to his unseen father, and Beck had become determined to learn all he could about it.
That had not been a difficult task. Colemore had an almost mythical status among the English. It was said to be the finest property in all Britain. Perhaps even the world.
These pronouncements had fed Beck’s young imagination. He’d tried to picture what his father’s home looked like. He’d found a book titledA Tour of Colemore and Its Gardens, a collection of essays written about the estate in the early 1700s by the rector of St. Albion’s church. Beck had even seen drawings of the church, knew it was of Norman origins and within four miles of Colemore.
However, now that the moment was at hand when he would see this great estate for himself, Beck felt conflicted.
What was it Gwendolyn had suggested? That she understoodhaving a desire for family?
He had given deep thought to that statement. Families were a mystery to him. Perhaps that was one of the reasons he found Gwendolyn and her sisters’ very strong bonds a curiosity. He couldn’timagine them abandoning each other. Or one of them abandoning their child.
In the dream, he felt as if he had to reach the woman to save her. He always woke before he knew why she was frightened. And he wondered if that fear was what had held her from him.
Now he was about to meet the father who had kept him at a distance. Gwendolyn had suggested meeting the marquess was Beck’s sole reason for going to Colemore. Her suggestion troubled him... because it might be true.
