Theo shrugged and sighed again. I couldn’t take it anymore. My heart felt like it was about to break if we didn’t get through this.
“Did I do something wrong, Theo?” I asked softly.
He shot me a quick glance, confusion clouding his face. “No. Why do you ask?”
My throat dried up, and my voice caught. “You’ve been really quiet. We haven’t been the same since I moved in. Do you want me to leave?”
“Not at all,” he said quickly. “I know I’ve been weird. It’s not… well…”
He went silent again. The tension in the car was so thick I thought the windows might crack.
“Just say it, Theo. Please.”
He finally looked at me, then looked back at the road. Deep breath. I thought he was going to say something, but then he roared in frustration and pulled over.
The bile crept to the back of my throat. Whatever he was going to say was big, and I fucking dreaded it.
He turned to me again, inhaled to speak, then sighed and rested his head on the steering wheel. “This is so hard,” he groaned.
I knew what was coming. He was going to ask the question I’d been dreading for years. He must have overheard me and Quincy. I felt so stupid.
“Just do it, Theo. Just say what you want to say because it’s killing me.”
Theo lifted his head and bellowed, “Are you gay, Asher?”
My eyes closed as that hollow feeling gobbled me up, tearswelling at the base of my eyes.
I sobbed, “Yes,” then ran out of the car, running into the woods that bordered the road and sprinting into the forest as fast as my legs could carry me.
Theo
“Wait! Asher!”
I locked the car as I bolted after him. The brush scratched my legs, and I held an arm just over my eyes to try to block the low-hanging branches. I squinted, doing everything in my power to home in on that bobbing bush of red hair that was rapidly outpacing me.
“Stop! Please!” I begged.
Asher was relentless, running faster than I’d ever seen him move, taking us deeper and deeper into the woods. I wouldn’t stop. The need to confess my feelings for him pushed me past my limits. Legs throbbing. Chest burning. My heart was in my throat. I had to tell him. I kept telling myself it would be okay if my feelings weren’t reciprocated, but I knew my heart would break if I heard those words.
Please God, let him like me back.
I finally caught up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist, trying to get him to stop. We stumbled and landed on the forest floor. Asher covered his face, audibly weeping into his hands.
“Asher, look at me.” He shook his head, refusing to pull his hands away from his face. “Asher, please look at me so I can talk to you.”
He shook his head again, still covering his face. “I’m sorry.” His voice sounded so small and wounded. I scooped him intomy arms and cradled his body, which was shaking as he wept. “I’m sorry I’m like this. I’m so sorry, Theo. Please don’t hate me.”
Now I was crying. To see him breaking apart like that because he thought I’d hate him for being gay filled me with a mix of despair and rage. Who told him he had to hide it? Who made him believe he couldn’t be honest? I was his best friend! He could tell me anything, and I’d be there.
“I could never hate you, Asher.”
He shuddered in my arms, and his sobbing eased a bit. Slowly, he lowered his hands and looked up at me with those wounded green eyes. He released little whimpers, trying to calm himself down as he lay in my embrace. “No?”
“No. Never. I could never hate you.” I pulled him in closer as I rested a hand on his chest. The touch sent a shiver racing through him, and he slowly rested his hand on mine. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked.
He opened his lips to speak, their pinkish hue making me warm, and said, “I was afraid I’d lose you.”
It hurt to hear those words. “I didn’t make you feel safe.”
