He snatched my hoodie by the chest and pulled me into him. His icy blue eyes bore into mine as his jaw muscles clenched. “This,” he raised the bottle to eyeline, “will be the only reason Idon’truin dinner tonight. Would Jill be happy if I stuck a knife in Hank’s throat? You think that would ruin her precious dinner?”
I wasn’t listening anymore. The smell of vodka burned my nose, and Rafael’s blue eyes flashed with emotion. Everything else just disappeared.
Rafael pushed me away and took another sip. He hissed at the taste. “This is going to ensure I don’t care. If I walk in there sober, something will happen. I promise you that much. Let me do this, and everything will be fine.”
I looked down at his leg, which was bouncing up and down again. It was as if something was trapped in his body, trying to pound its way out. I licked my lips. I didn’t know how to ask the next question. Maybe it wasn’t a question. Perhaps he just needed to know someone kind of got it. Whatever my rationale, I said it. “Look. It must be hard. Seeing Mattie’s—”
His hand gripped my neck faster than lightning, and he pushed me against the door, my head slamming into the window.
“His name doesn’t leave your lips. You hear?” His voice was a full octave lower. It was haunting—detached—like it wasn’t even him. Even his face changed. There wasn’t rage, malice, or hate. He just looked empty.
The skin on my neck prickled as his hand gripped my throat, and a tingling sensation began to travel down my back. I clenched my fists, preparing myself to fight.
“Get your hand off my neck or you’ll regret it,” I said.
Life came back into his eyes like someone flipped a switch. He looked shocked for a moment. Then, he sneered at me. “Oh yeah? What’ll you do to me, Golden Boy?”
My jaw clenched, and I could hear my molars grinding against each other. “You don’t get to do this,” I warned. “You don’t get to put your hands on me.”
He cocked his head. “Hmm, is that a fact? What are you going to do about it?”
I snapped my arms forward, my fists gripping his shirt, and slammed him against the window. The impact made him cough, and he stared at me, eyes flashing with excitement. His mouth twisted into a macabre smile. “Fuck, Cody. You like it rough?”
I blinked with confusion. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Rafael released a fast jab to my ribs, knocking the wind out of me. He pulled me into a headlock then hissed in my ears, “If you want to fight me, all you have to do is say the words. I’ll drag your ass out of this car and beat you to a pulp in the parking lot. How do you think your mommy would react to that?”
My hands gripped his arm, and I struggled to free myself. I gasped for breath as I kicked against the door, but I couldn’t get free.
“You want me to stop?” He asked.
I pushed my feet against the car door harder, trying to use the force to shove his body against the door on his side. My hands grasped for his face, but all I could grab were fistfuls of his black hair.
“Mmm, I love it when you pull my hair like that, Golden Boy.”
The lights started to fade, and my thrashing slowed. “Say please,” he demanded.
It killed me to do it, but I rasped out a breathy ‘please,’ and he let go. I heaved as air finally filled my lungs again.
“Good boy,” he said. “Now drive to this fucking restaurant. I’m famished.”
Chapter 6
Rafael
The curtains in my new bedroom did nothing to block the sun. Light bounced off the white walls with a blinding effect.Blackout curtains should be required by law.
True to my word, I didn’t stab Hank in the neck. I was halfway coherent enough to know that I’d minded my p’s and q’s and got through the evening without causing a scene. That would come later. I had a plan, and I wasn’t about to let the picture of Mattie throw me off.
Plus, I made sure to get clear liquor. Smirnoff made me forget. Dark liquor made me nuts. With something dark, like rum or whiskey, I’d be screamingSweet Carolinelike an idiot one minute, then slamming some douchebag through a dining room table the next.Yes, that actually happened.Clear liquor just killed the pain, and that’s all I needed.
Something happened when I saw his picture. I hadn’t seen a picture of Mattie in years because Mom threw them all out one night right after the funeral. I was furious with her when she did it, but I could understand after my reaction to seeing the picture in Hank’s living room. My body froze. It was like the water I’d swallowed trying to stay afloat that day had lingered in the pit of my stomach for years, and seeing Mattie’s picture made it rise to the back of my mouth. My throat burned, and I could taste the salt of the sea. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t make my body work. It just shut down.
Then he touched me. Cody was the first one to come to me. God, why did he have to do that? I didn’t want to feel anything for him except hatred.I hate Cody.
I couldn’t let him throw me off. Fuck those big brown eyes and his stupid face.Was he that muscular at the wedding?
Cody had gotten strong as hell since the last time I saw him. Our tussle in the car ignited something in me I hadn’t expected. He was such a juicy challenge. Cody walked around with this noble air, but his tense body betrayed how wound up he was inside. I wanted to unwind him. Better yet, I wanted to snap his emotional restraints to bits then pummel him into the ground like a fucking Whack-a-Mole game.
