“I hate him.”
Validate. Discuss. Hope that the hate doesn’t grow. What she should do rattles through Kim’s head. This knowledge is like grieving all over again. Denial, anger, depression, acceptance.
“I know. I hated him, too, when I found out, because he’d lied to us. But Daddy loved us both. We were special and important to him. He just loved his other family as well.”
“Did he love them more?” Bella asks. Her words are small, folded in on themselves, as if they’re trapped in her chest.
“No, he loved us the same.”
“He must have loved them more, ’cause otherwise, we would have been his real family, not his pretend one. The police would have told us when he was in the accident.”
Oh, you smart and clever kid.Kim closes her eyes. “He had his other family first. He met me after, when he already had a partner.”
“Did he have the other kid then?”
“No, you’re very close in age, though. You’re a little older.”
“Then I should be his best kid, not the other one. He should have lived with us always.”
So simplistic, like a game of tag. Tag, you’re it. Tag, you’re out. Tag, you’re number one.
“I hate her too.”
Kim’s breath freezes in her lungs, and she forces herself to exhale, then inhale again. Once she’s sure she’s breathing, that she won’t sit here in suspended animation, she strokes Bella’s hair. “You might hate what she represents right now, but you already know her. Your daddy’s other little girl is a friend of yours. Someone you like very much. And right now, her mum is telling her what I’m telling you. She didn’t know about us either. Nor did her mum.”
Bella’s forehead scrunches.
Kim forces herself to keep breathing. In. Out. In. Out. Any moment now, Bella will put it together, and it will either be better, or so much worse.
“But you did.” Her brows lower into a fierce line. “You knew Daddy had another family?” At the last minute, it becomes a question, as if Bella still can’t bring herself to believe that Kimknewand didn’t tell her the second she found out.
“I found out a little while ago. I wanted to tell you before, but I needed to talk to Daddy’s other partner first.”
“You should have told me first.” Bella’s voice breaks on the last word.
“Maybe I should,” Kim agrees, “but I had to find out where we stood. What the other family knew. And it was so very, very hurtful to them, just like it is to you and me.”
Bella is silent, biting her lip. “The other little girl is someone I know? A friend?Who?”Her lips wobble. “Is it Jorie?”
“No, it’s not Jorie.” She takes a deep breath. Is she about to shatter something beautiful and fragile—Bella’s new friendship with Cami, a friendship that already seems so intense on both sides? “It’s your new friend, Cami. Her mum, Danika, was your daddy’s wife.”
“No!” Bella rears back, thumps both hands on Kim’s chest, and instantly she’s a metre away as if she teleported there. “Cami’s myfriend. She’s not my sister—she can’t be. She wouldn’t do that to me.”
“It’s not something she could choose.” Kim’s ribs creak like old floorboards, and there’s a pain in her chest that’s not entirely due to Bella’s fists. “Danika’s telling her right now. She probably feels as angry and as upset as you.”
“She can’t be.” Tears stream down Bella’s face, which is blotchy and red. Her fists ball at her sides.
Kim takes a step toward her, and Bella takes two steps back until her legs press against the couch.
“Cami likes soccer. I like soccer. We both like spicy food. Coach said we look so much alike we could be sisters.” Her face scrunches. “Does Coach know too? Does everyone know?”
“Coach has no idea. She said it because you and Cami do look alike.”
“I’m not going to soccer ever again—I’ll do something else. I don’t want to see her.”
How does she handle this? Because it’s not just about Bella anymore, it’s about Danika and Cami. And herself. But right now, it’s Bella who counts, Bella she has to watch over and try to make it right for.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. And you can still go to soccer if you want; you can just skip anything that would involve Cami’s team.”
