She took a slurp of her coffee and grimaced when she found it cold. If there were no more major hold-ups, she might still get to Sophie’s by four. Then, if Allie wouldn’t see her, she’d pay an unannounced visit to her mama and drive home tomorrow. She had no clue how this would go. Come to that, she had no idea what to say, or even what she was offering Allie. What she did know was things had ended badly and it was mainly her fault.
Deep inside, in a secret place only now seeing the sunlight, she had accepted she wasn’t ready to let Allie go.
* * *
Allie scrolled through the food delivery app, trying to decide what to order. Chinese, Japanese, Korean, smoked barbecue, Thai, modern Australian, healthy burgers, Iranian… Sydney’s selection was as wide as the Harbour Bridge…and nearly as expensive. In Quandong, it was Thai, pub food, or the prepared meals from Kirra’s Kafé. All good choices. She took a sip of wine and rolled it around her mouth.
She flicked past the Thai selections. It reminded her too much of Quandong and the café that had quickly learnt her preferred choices. Sushi maybe. Or Korean. A spicy bulgogi might sear the thoughts of Tarryn from her mind. As she picked up her phone, the security buzzer went. She frowned. She wasn’t expecting anyone, and she had no idea who it could be. She put her phone down and went over to the intercom. “Hello.”
“Hi Allie, it’s Tarryn. Can we talk?”
She released the button in surprise. Tarryn. Here. A wisp of hope uncurled. Tarryn was here and there’d been no anger in her voice, no Antarctic chill. She’d driven for a day to come and talk face-to-face. Surely it wouldn’t be to say what they’d had was over. She’d done that very effectively in Quandong. For a moment, she wished hard the intercom had a camera. She could only imagine Tarryn at the front door, shoulders hunched, hands in the pockets of her jeans.
She’d hesitated too long. The intercom buzzed again.
“Please, Allie? I won’t take long, if that’s what you want. I just want to say…to say I’m sorry, I guess.”
So she was sorry. She’d come a long way to clear the air, if that’s all it was. Surely a phone call would have done. The tendril of hope grew shoots that curled into her chest. “Sure. I’ll buzz you up.”
The ninety seconds or so it took Tarryn to find her apartment ticked off as slowly as a week of wet Wednesdays. Allie stood in her kitchen, gripping the counter, mind buzzing through inconsequential things: she had wine in the fridge and fresh milk. She could offer tea, coffee, wine, water. Had Tarryn eaten? Was she going to apologise and leave?
Would Tarryn stay?
Would she let her?
When the knock finally came on her door, Allie uncurled her hands from the counter, took a deep breath, and took the three paces to answer it.
Tarryn stood as she’d imagined: shoulders hunched, hands pushed deep into the front pockets of her jeans. The planes of her face stood out in the dim lighting, and her grey curls shone silver.
Allie stuck her hands into the pockets of her own jeans so she didn’t reach out to touch her. “Hi. Come in. I’m not sure why you’re here, so I don’t know whether to offer you anything.”
“A glass of water would be good.”
Allie poured one, added a couple of ice cubes, then gestured to the living area. “Sit. If you want.”
When Tarryn had sat in the chair, Allie took the couch. She picked up her wine and took another sip, then sat back, crossing her legs, hoping she looked cool and unconcerned.
Tarryn took a gulp of her water, then set it down and leaned forward, elbows on her knees, staring at the floor.
Allie counted her heartbeats. When it got to two hundred, she said, “I know there’s a stain on the carpet by your feet, but it’s not that fascinating.”
“It’s the shape of Australia. But Tasmania’s missing. Maybe I should drop something to complete the map.”
“Please don’t. I’ll want my security bond back at some point.” When Tarryn raised her gaze, Allie said, “Why are you here?”
Tarryn sucked her lower lip. “It’s complicated. I told Sophie I was collecting the banners you took. And I might visit my mother.”
“Does she know you’re here?”
“No,” Tarryn admitted.
Allie’s lips twitched. “Maybe she’s gone on holiday. Somewhere beachy like Byron Bay. She can visit you while she’s there. It’s possible—it seems not letting others know your plans runs in the family.”
“True.” Tarryn sat back and picked up her water again. Her chest heaved. “Okay, the truth is I’m here to say I’m sorry.”
Allie’s heart sank faster than a rowboat in a cyclone. Was that all this was? A quick apology and then Tarryn would call her mother. “The telephone was invented for things like that. Or email.”
“I was an arse.”
