When I peek back up, his tongue swipes over his bottom lip. The silence pulls at the tension between us as we stand in the grassy expanse, near the orchard that flanks both sides of the road and spills toward the cliffside. The only sounds are the waves kissing the rock below and the breeze ruffling through the trees.
The breath he blows out traps mine in my lungs. “I loved it too much and loathed it a fucking lot.” His eyes dart between mine as he advances toward me. “I want you, okay? Is that what you want to hear?”
Words evade me.
“Or maybe I should get on my knees, bury my head between your legs, and stroke your clit with my tongue while I whisper against your pussy that all I fucking want is for you to be mine, and only mine. I. Want. You,” he reiterates.
I shake my head, feeling my heart tighten in my throat. “And why is that a problem?”
“Because I can never give you all of me, Taryn…I know that’s a lot to ask of someone. You’ll have to accept the parts I allow you to have.”
“Why?” I breathe, focusing on the moonlight flickering in his gaze.
“Because I know how much of yourself you can lose when you give over everything you are to someone.”
My head tilts, my heart breaking at the emotion slipping through his tone.
It is a lot to ask someone, but I know his baggage. Well, not all his baggage; it is more like a carry-on with the things I’ve collected here and there over the last couple months: facts about his childhood, his parents, and what happened five years ago.
He’s tormented by all of it.
For some reason, all I want to do is be a sliver of his relief. I see how hard he works. I see how he loves his family unconditionally. He’d do almost anything to ensure they’re happy and protected. Jessica said Cameron is the brother who loves hard, but I’ve come to realize Colten Lindenvale loves effortlessly despite the shit he’s been through. He just doesn’t recognize it.
I step into him so my breasts brush against his chest, his focus landing on the movement in the expanse of my throat. “Okay,” I whisper.
Lines form between his brows while he peers down at me so profoundly that something catches fire deep in my soul. “Okay, what?”
“I accept whatever you’ll allow me to have, Colten.”
The emotions crossing his features are unlike anything I’ve ever seen. It’s a seamless blend of awe and reprieve, and my heart swells in response.
He lifts his hand, letting his fingers drift over the skin on the underside of my jaw. “Are you sure? It’s a lot to ask of you, and I don’t want you to resent me.”
A smile tugs at my lips. “I resented you once, and here we are.”
His palm flattens on the back of my neck. Colten’s head dips, his lips brushing mine so softly that an eruption of sparklers fizzles through my nerves. His tongue flicks against my bottom lip in an unhurried, playful stroke, and my mouth parts, searching for more. Our tongues intertwine, pulling a groan from his chest that vibrates against mine.
“Come home with me,” he whispers against my lips, the silent request striking my pulsing clit.
Pulling away, I stare up at him. “I have a feeling you might drag me there anyway.”
“Damn straight, Little Ghost.”
Lowering his body, he grips the backs of my thighs, lifting me effortlessly into his strong arms and carrying me toward his truck. Cradling the back of my head, his lips find mine again, his sweet taste driving me wild.
But a twinge of doubt pierces through the bliss because he didn’t say, ‘I can’t give you all of me.’
He said, ‘I cannevergive you all of me.’
THIRTY-SEVEN | COLTEN
Have I said I’m screwed yet? Like majorly fucked because I can’t stop thinking about her.
I can’t stop lusting after her.
And my hands won’t stop drifting over Taryn’s delicate, naked body sprawled under my sheets as if she belongs on my bed with them. And I’m starting to think she does.
I said I could never give her all of me. It’s what I’ve told every woman who’s stepped into this house before. Yet I didn’t quite convince myself when I said it to her. Because I’m starting to wonder if she’s the one person I could let go for.
