“Are you okay?”
The question took me by surprise, even though it shouldn’t have. I’d noticed over the years how Yasu paid just a little more attention to me than everyone else. He cared. That mattered. Maybe that was what had drawn me to him so much.
It didn’t excuse the completely inappropriate thoughts I’d had about him the night before. Thoughts that were now sitting front and center in my mind, making me undeniably hard. All I wanted to do was reach between my legs and relieve the ache, but when Yasu cleared his throat, I realized I’d forgotten to answer him.
“Fine,” I squeaked and in no way sounded believable.
“Are you sure?” He didn’t sound like he believed me. Not that I would blame him.
I rolled out of bed, scowling at my reflection in the mirror. While I completely understood that going drinking was expected in Japan, it didn’t change the fact that I hated how I looked the morning after. My eyes were always so damn puffy, and I didn’t have time to properly get myself ready for the day.
“Yeah. I think I overdid it last night.” Cardinal sin number one is to admit that, but this was my best friend. He’d understand. It wasn’t like he’d gone with us to begin with, so if anyone was in the doghouse over the whole thing, it was him.
“Just hurry up and get here.” There was a touch of desperation to his voice, and I wondered if it had anything to do with being left alone to work with Ryosuke. I’d been so proud of him theday before for making the effort to apologize to him, but I knew it would take time for them to be comfortable with each other. Much less star in my sexual fantasies.
What a mess.
I hung up the phone, quickly pulling off my sleep clothes and dug through my closest to find something at least remotely presentable to wear for the day. If anything, I wouldn’t sacrifice my looks when it came to my clothes.
The pale blue sweater and short lace skirt were the perfect combination. I pulled them on with a pair of thigh-high socks that had lacy accents that matched the skirt at the top. I didn’t always dress so feminine on practice days, but the outfit spoke to me for the day. After brushing out my hair and looking in the mirror to make sure I didn’t look too puffy, I shoved my feet into a pair of platform Mary-janes before heading out the door.
It was cold outside, and the cool morning air blasted me, making me wish I’d grabbed a jacket, but I didn’t have time to turn back. The ride on the subway to the station outside the studio was always tense. People stared, and I couldn’t tell if it was because they couldn’t figure me out or just what I was wearing.
There was a part of me that wondered if I could get away with riding in the female-only car, but I didn’t want to break that trust. At least I knew I wouldn’t get so many awkward stares there.
Chapter 13
Yasu
After Itsuki finally made it to practice, I couldn’t keep my eyes off him. More like I couldn’t keep my eyes off the way that Ryosuke couldn’t keep his eyes off him.
Maybe I should have gone out with them the night before, because then I’d have a clue why Itsu suddenly seemed so bashful around our new bassist. If the man had done something to him, I’d break his fucking legs. Not that I had any sort of claim over Itsuki. I just didn’t want anything to happen to him.
Riku and Tatsuki didn’t seem any different outside of being more friendly and talking to Ryosuke a bit more. Maybe whatever happened between him and Itsuki happened after they left. That was assuming they left Itsuki alone with him.
Would they have done that?
I was the one who was distracted.
Practice usually went better, at least I could play it off as Itsuki’s late arrival was playing a part, but something much deeper was the root cause.
A different sort of feeling swirled low in my gut as I watched Ryosuke approach Itsuki after we were done leaning in close to talk to him. My jaw ached from the way my teeth clenched as I watched them.
Speak the fuck up, Yasu. This is stupid.
But did I? No. Of course I didn’t.
Instead, I let the anger continue to bubble in my belly as I watched them. They looked like they’d been best friends for a lot longer than Itsuki and I. The feeling was new, and it wasn’t one that I enjoyed.
Instead of continuing to dwell on it, I stormed out of the practice space, slamming the door behind me.
I didn’t make it very far down the hall before I heard Itsuki’s sweet voice calling out to me.
“Yasu. Yasu-san!”
My feet refused to move because I couldn’t deny him. I was soft for Itsuki in ways I wasn’t soft for anyone else.
Thin arms wrapped around me, and even though physical affection like that had always been unwelcome, it hadn’t ever bothered me when Itsuki did it. There was something about his touch that brought comfort instead of making me squirm like it did with everyone else. It was one of the few reasons I let him get away with it.
