‘Come on,’ I murmur. ‘The guilt would tear me apart, knowing I took it from your brother’s possession. I’ll be fine, I don’t need it.’ I let the lie leave my mouth without a thought as I smile. ‘But your brother probably does right now, and you need to give it to him.’
His face transforms into something I’ve never seen from him before. If I didn’t know him better I’d say it almost looks like he’s holding back tears. He shakes his head, releasing his hold on my wrist and tearing his arm away like it’s red-hot.
‘I can’t,’ he says firmly. ‘I can’t take it from you.’
I step closer to him and take his hand in my own. Trying to ignore the way it feels within mine, I tuck the drumstick into his palm and tenderly wrap both my hands around his loose grip on it, tightening his fingers around it.
‘Yes, you can,’ I say, my voice quiet but sure.
Something in his jaw ticks and his arms are suddenly around me, sweeping me into the tightest, most delicious embrace. Every muscle in my body relaxes as I wrap my arms around him with a sigh. Not caring about how it looks, I let myself bury my face into the nape of his neck and breathe in his scent for the last time.
I release myself from his clasp, but he keeps his hands firmly on my shoulders.
‘Out of everyone in the world I could have been attached to, I’m glad it was you,’ he says, his smile so warm and open that I’m caught halfway between beaming and bursting into tears.
‘Me too,’ I say with a nod, attempting to blink the tears back into my skull.
As he lets go, Hennie approaches with a wry smile to give Elliot a stiff pat on the arm. ‘See ya.’
‘Bye, Hennie,’ he replies with a nod. ‘It was good meeting you.’
‘Sure. Uh… ditto,’ she says awkwardly.
‘You don’t have to lie. I thought that wasn’t in your character.’
‘Good. In that case: may our time apart make you less annoying,’ Hennie says with a salute.
‘Amen!’ Owen agrees. I don’t bother hiding my hearty laugh.
‘Good, brilliant,’ Elliot mumbles.
‘Could we hold the dramatics? This isn’tfarewell forever,losers,’ Josh says, motioning at us with impatient hands.
Owen addresses Hennie quietly about something to do with the month of October, and Elliot turns to me very abruptly.
‘We should definitely do something soon,’ he says quietly.
For a second I am breathless, positivelyquakingat the statement. The idea that we will all see each other again, this wasn’t just for a brief moment of time. Not just a weekend.
My face lights up, my mouth breaking into an uncontrollable grin.
‘For sure,’ I agree with an eager nod. ‘We should do Firecrest again, the five of us.’
His expression falls for a moment, so briefly I almost don’t catch it. But then his smile is back. ‘Yeah. If we can get tickets, let’s do it.’
My lips start to form a response, except nothing comes out.
For the first time since we met, I can’t think of anything to say. We stare into the space around each other, all of the words unsaid floating between us. All of the things I would say if I was a little more brave, a little less hopeless.
The heat in my chest relentlessly churns, twisting and aching. And it physically hits me that I won’t see him again tomorrow. That we’ll never have this sort of closeness again, where his hand finds my back in a crowd and I always have an excuse to stick to his side. Where we wake up together and say goodnight side-by-side. It feels as if this close, inexplicable bond that we have somehow built over the weekend is soon to come undone, and I can only watch as it unravels.
I clear my throat to break the silence I can no longer endure.
‘Enjoy the K-pop,’ I joke weakly.
‘I’m not sure I have a choice,’ Elliot matches my tone, but he won’t meet my eyes.
‘Correct,’ Josh chimes in from afar, pointing at Elliot menacingly. ‘He will enjoy it very much, won’t you, Elliot? It’s been two long years since this band has performed in this country.’
