“We did, but from behind.”
“So you want from the front.”
“Yeah. Yeah. Like if someone—”
“Got hold of you by the lapels of your jacket.”
“Exactly that. Exactly. Show me how to get out of that.”
“All right. All right,” he said, though he didn’t automatically go for it in that practical way she’d come to expect. Instead, he just stood there with his hands half raised to her, as if this was just as awkward as the hugging and the face touching, somehow.
It made him hesitate. And when he did finally start talking, it was without any contact to back it up. He didn’t illustrate. He just explained.
“So, ideally what you want to do is anticipate the grab before it even happens. Watch the shoulders, like we talked about.”
“But if I miss the shoulders? Then what?”
“Then you have to break the grip, same as before.”
“Makes sense. Though I’m guessing the technique is different.”
“Yeah it’s different. This way, you can’t lock them in or force them to bend. You’ve got to go for the hands, the thumbs. Make them let go of you. Understand?”
“I do. But maybe a demonstration is in order.”
It was weird, having to ask him for it. To actuallyasksomeone to do something that she still had nightmares about. But even weirder when he grabbed hold of her top. She felt his knuckles press into her chest—and really, that should have been enough. Even though he did it lightly, even though he did it gingerly, it should have been enough. Her stomach was supposed to sink. All her feelings for him were meant to run right out of her body.
But instead, the opposite was somehow happening.
A great jolt of joy went through her, the moment he took hold. Like her body was sayingsee, this is how much you trust him. This is how much you like him. This is how gentle and caring he is—he can even dothis,and nothing happens.
All of which was very good in one way.
But very bad in another.
Now, she was not only more inclined to do something extremely stupid, she was close enough to do it. His body was practically pressed against hers. His mouth was barely three inches away. All she had to do to kiss him was go up on tiptoe, and even worse: the urge to do it wasmuchstronger than she’d anticipated.
His lips were parted; he was breathing hot and hard.
He wants you to, her mind whispered, like some snake in the grass.
And then she simplyhadto do something to kill it dead.
“Can you pick me up like this?” she asked.
But again, it was him who hesitated.
“I don’t think I should pick you up.”
“But you could. You could do it.”
“I’m strong enough to, yes.”
“So let me see then.”
She braced herself for it. Though even as she did, she knew she wasn’t going to need it. He was just too good. Her trust in him was too great. And most of all: he was way, way too reluctant about it. He actually closed his eyes briefly, as he lifted her. She saw his jaw clench, even though the effort it took seemed to be minimal.
And once her feet were off the ground, he couldn’t look at her.
