“I choose you all.” I stare between them. “I didn’t expect to fall for any of you, didn’t expect to care. But I did. And I do. So I’m sorry, but I can’t think of being with one of you and not the others. And it’s not fair. I know that.” I exhale. “It’s crazy and people will talk, but that doesn’t matter. It’s all noise that gets drowned out the moment I look into your eyes.”
Turning to Alex, I continue. “Or when you make me laugh or bring me into one of your impulsive moods.”
Then I peer up at Mountain. “Or when you just give me space to feel safe around you.”
“What are you saying?” Alex interjects.
I shrug helplessly. “I guess I’m saying that if I have to pick one of you, then I can’t pick at all.” I stare at each of them. “It’ll hurt too much, and if that’s not something any of you want, I’ll respect that. The last thing I want is to hurt any of you. For me, it’s all or nothing. But this is your lives, too, so you’re going to have to make your decision.”
The room is quiet for a moment. This time heavier, more like gravity than tension. And we sit, our gazes passing around the room like we need someone else to break the ice. Alex does the honor, reaching out for my hand, and brings me close, letting his fingers brush against my thigh. His touch is subtle, stifled by the fabric of my jeans, but it stills sends a chill through my body.
“I’ve already told you where I stand,” he says, his voice low yet full of conviction. “I want you.”
Mountain inches closer, his hand at the small of my back as he hooks a finger under my chin to bring my gaze to his. “I’d rather share you than not have you.”
We turn our heads to Kane.
“How is this even supposed to work?” Kane says after a long moment.
I shake my head. “I don’t know how any of this works. I’ve never had an actual boyfriend, let alone three. We’ll be figuring it out together. But it shouldn’t be hard as long as we love each other. Right?”
“You love us?”
I look at them, my heart fuller than it’s ever been. Never in a million years did I think I would be in such a position, and maybe it’s a trauma bond and I’ll soon learn that it’s a mistake. But it’s one I’m willing to make.
“Yes. I love you, Kane. And if I’m being honest, I probably have since we were kids.”
He blinks, a smile beginning to tug at his lips, but he manages to keep it from forming.
“And as much as you got under my skin”—I grip Alex’s jaw, and he nestles his face against my palm—“I love you, too.”
Turning my head to Mountain, I smile before laying my other hand on his chest.
“And falling in love with you has been the easiest thing of my life.”
“So, you’ll be with all of us?” Kane asks.
“Yes.”
He nods coolly. “Together? At the same time?”
“I mean, she does have three holes,” Alex interjects sarcastically.
“Pause,” I quip. “This is my first quartet—”
“Is that what it’s called?” Mountain chimes in.
I shrug. “Four-way? I don’t know. Either way… we should hold off on the butt stuff for a while.”
Alex chuckles.
“But I’d love to be with you together,” I continue.
Kane swallows, his sight shifting between us. “Four might be a crowd.”
“Crowds can be fun,” I whisper, my breathing now labored.
Mountain groans beside me, his fingers twitching at the small of my back while Alex claws at my denim-clad thigh. Without another word, Alex stands to his full height.
