I was jolted out of my spiral of self-loathing when a nurse called my name. I stood, still surprised when a wave of dizziness didn’t wash over me. I hadn’t realized how much the suppressants were messing with me, but I felt stronger and more clearheaded than I had in weeks.
And I couldn’t even find it within myself to care.
Nothing mattered without Lucy. I even missed King and Leo. The video game Leo liked came out yesterday, and I’d been tempted to get it for him. I was sure they both hated me now. I was a risk to their omega.
The nurse—Annie—made chipper small talk as she led me down the hallway. My only response was a grunt, and that made me think about King’s exasperation with my nonverbal responses. Riling him up had been one of the best parts of working together on Stanley’s projects.
“You’ll be in here today. I’ll get your vitals and Dr.Finch will be right in.”
I’d expected the clinic to be white and sterile, but the hallway had a huge rainbow painted on the walls and no scent of antiseptic hung in the air—likely because of the hum of the heavy de-scenter machines running in the background. Dr.Finch was the only designation medicine specialist in town, which meant Lucy probably came here for medical care, too. I bet she liked the mural. It was as bright and vibrant as her.
Once the nurse finished with me, she left me alone in the room. I groaned and rested my head in my hands. This appointment was useless. It wasn’t like this doctor could tell me anything new. I couldn’t take suppressants anymore, which meant I couldn’t be around any omegas, especially not the one my alpha was fixated on.
The door opened and an omega with curly black hair entered. “Hi, Wilder. I’m Dr.Finch. How’re you doing today?” She sat down on a rolling stool in front of me and opened up her laptop.
“Fine.”
She hummed to herself as she typed something on her computer. “I’ve reviewed your records from the hospital. Your lab work showed some very troubling levels. You were diagnosed with hyper alphosferone at fourteen?”
I nodded.
“And you’ve just taken suppressants for treatment?”
My brow furrowed. She asked as if there were other options. Before I could respond, there was a knock on the door.
“Come in,” Dr.Finch called out.
Annie popped her head in. “Sorry for the interruption. Mr.Everett’s omega has arrived.” She turned to me. “I didn’t realize you were waiting for someone when I brought you back. You should have said something!”
My heart raced as the nurse stepped aside, allowing Lucy to slip inside.
“Sorry I’m late,” she said, slightly out of breath. “Hi, Dr.Finch.”
“Hey, Lucy.” The doctor looked between the two of us, her eyes wide. “I didn’t realize you were together.”
I opened my mouth, but Lucy spoke first. “It’s new, but yes, we are.” She sat in the chair next to me, so close our arms brushed. I clenched my fists tight, fighting my screaming instincts that urged me to pull her into my lap.
Dr.Finch glanced at the computer. “You’re not bonded, right? Your discharge paperwork listed you as single, but maybe they just meant unbonded?”
Her devastated face in the hospital room. Her twisted scent. Tears dripping down her cheeks.
Lucy brushed her fingers over my wrist, gently unfurling my fist and entwining her fingers with mine. My chest felt tight and expansive at the same time. This was the first time I’d been around herwithout any suppressants in my system, let alone the extra doses I’d been popping since we met. I breathed slowly through my mouth, fighting the temptation to drag her onto my lap and scent-mark her.
“Not bonded yet,” Lucy answered easily. I didn’t have it in me to argue, because what the fuck was happening? Why wasn’t she demanding I leave town forever? She should hate me.
“Do you have others in your pack?”
“Yes. King, another alpha, and Leo, a beta.”
Dr.Finch nodded. “That’s good. I don’t quite understand why you were taking such high doses of rut suppressants when you’re courting Lucy.”
Had I landed in an alternate universe? Nothing about her question made sense.
“I could hurt her.” It hated speaking the truth out loud, but it had to be done. I moved my hand out of Lucy’s reach and shifted to create space between us.
She crossed her arms with an adorable little huff. “He won’t have sex with me. Apparently, his cock is just too powerful.”
I choked on my spit and Dr.Finch’s lips twitched.
