“Is this a new bakery dress code I didn’t know about?” I asked. I meant for it to sound like a joke, but Westin curled in on herself as she fidgeted with the edge of her sweatshirt. I wanted to tear it off and replace it with one of my own so she was wrapped in my scent.
“Oh, ha,” she said with a forced laugh. “I’m actually not going to work today. Seems like I might be sick.”
“What’s wrong?” I asked, a jolt of fear running through me.
She ignored my question. “I would have told you I wasn’t going in today, but I overslept. I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”
You’re never an inconvenience.
Let me take care of you.
“Do you need me to stay? Or bring you something?” I asked. She looked so unlike the vibrant Westin I was used to, and it scared me.
“I’m fine,” she responded quickly.
We stood there in an awkward silence I didn’t know how to break.
“Oh, here.” She handed me a small envelope.
I opened it up and found a bunch of change.
“What’s this?”
“What I owe you for the burger,” she said, not meeting my eyes. “Thanks again.”
I looked at the change, embarrassment flooding me. I guessed I did say she could pay me back, but I hadn’t meant it. “Is this a joke?” My words came out harsher than I meant them to. The only person I was angry with was myself.
Her startled eyes met mine. “No, I just… wanted to pay you back. Sorry.” She wrung her hands as she took a deep breath and blinked rapidly. “Anyway, I’ll just text you once I’m returning to work, okay? I’m not scheduled for the next few days.”
My hands itched with the need to pull her into my chest. I didn’t even care anymore that she’d lied to me…Ifshe’d even lied. Visions of her collapsing in the parking lot kept me awake all night, eroding the certainty I’d felt after reading her medical records. But I didn’t know how to make the words I wanted to say come out.
“I’ll see you later?” she prompted when I didn’t leave.
“Right, sure. You should go back to bed. Just… take care of yourself, okay?”
She nodded, opening her mouth like she wanted to say something. But then she swallowed, gave me a curt nod, and closed the door.
38
GRAY
Ileft Westin’s and drove to a nearby car wash to do my weekly car detailing. I could barely focus on what I was doing. My mind was back with the tiny omega who had captured my heart.
I kept pulling out my phone to text her and make sure she was getting some rest, but I couldn’t follow through. Westin didn’t want to hear from me. I’d never thought of myself as a cruel person, but that’s what I’d been to her. That was clear to me now. I hadn’t even fucking wished her a happy birthday.
The selfie she’d taken of us that first week stared back at me. I couldn’t believe how thoroughly I’d messed everything up. It was so obvious now that I was the one who had screwed up. Why had I been so quick to believe her uncles? Westin had never done a single thing to manipulate me… It wasmethat was completely taken with her. Obsessed. And that had scared the shit out of me.
I threw my phone down and grabbed the vacuum to tackle the backseats. Maybe I should suggest she get another bodyguard. My hand clenched around the vacuum nozzle, crushing it until it was at risk of breaking. I wanted to be the onlyone protecting her, but she deserved someone who hadn’t hurt her.
I returned to the backseat, vacuuming angrily, when I saw a black bag on the floor that blended in with the upholstery. I recognized it as Westin’s tote. A thrill of happiness went through me that I now had an excuse to contact her. When I picked up the bag, a small pink notebook fell out. I traced my finger over the cover where the word “journal” was embossed in gold.
I should have put it back in the bag and dropped it off at her house, but my fingers opened the cover without my permission. Westin was a mystery, and I was desperate to know her more.
I flipped through the pages quickly, as if that would make my actions any less invasive, but I stopped when I came to a page titled “Symptom Tracker.”
A sick feeling grew in my stomach as I read her neat handwriting.
Monday: Dizzy, head pain, tired
