My vision darkened as the past tried to encroach on the present—the smell of antiseptic and rotting fruit, the cold feel of metal. The scar on my arm burned, and I bit my lip to stop from whining.
For a moment, I fought Jericho’s bark, locking my knees against the urge to sit down. He stared me down until I couldn’t hold out any longer. My legs propelled me forward, and I crumpled into the chair next to Amirah. Silence blanketed the room as I tried to control my breathing, my heart still racing with the effort of fighting his bark.
My mother was the first to speak up. “What was that?” she asked in a shrill voice.
“What do you mean?” I responded, keeping my voice as monotone as possible. I was sure she was not referencing Jericho using his bark on me. She had never stepped in to protect me before.
“You had no right cutting that first interview short,” Richard snarled. “Pack Madden is highly respected. You should be flattered they even wanted to interview with you. You’re a disgrace.”
“My behavior? They insulted me and grabbed me.” I pinned my hands under my thighs to keep myself from launching across the table.
Jericho cut me off. “They were absolutely right that you need a firm hand. You’ve always been headstrong and unruly. You should never have been allowed to live on your own.”
“The law doesn’t prohibit me from moving out of your house,” I said.
“Not yet,” Richard responded menacingly.
The director cut in. “Josephine, you’ve met two packs. You disappointed us with your insult of Pack Madden, an upstanding group of alphas. While you’re technically free to choose between either pack, Pack Ashwood did not follow interview procedure when they touched you. We are unsure if they are an acceptable pack option.”
Time stood still. I glanced over at Amirah, whose face was a blank mask, but I could scent her burnt caramel anger. It came as no surprise they were trying to pull something like this. I knew from years of experience with my parents that if I showed any emotion right now, they would use it against me. I used all my inner strength to stay calm as I turned towards the director.
“Both packs breached that policy. Pack Madden actually injured me.” I held up my wrist. “Pack Ashwood was trying to help me. You shouldn’t disqualify them for that.”
Director Whiteburn’s lip curled and he looked like he’d eaten something sour. He knew I was right. I fought the urge to smirk and instead met his gaze, refusing to lower my eyes in submission.
Richard burst out, “You can’t possibly be thinking of choosing them. This is unacceptable.”
Amirah spoke up for the first time. “You would do well to remember that Josie has the ultimate say here. The DC has vetted both packs, and she is free to choose either. Or she could choose to do additional interviews. This is all well within her rights.”
The director opened the folder in front of him. “Actually, Mrs. Raven, we don’t have time for more interviews. Josephine’s updated bloodwork came in and she’s due to go into heat in the next two days. She can choose one of today’s packs or we can assign her a heat pack and resume interviews after her heat.”
“No, that won’t be necessary. I’m choosing Pack Ashwood,” I blurted out. A slight, glowy warmth grew in my stomach at how right it felt to say it out loud.
The room exploded in an uproar, my pack fathers arguing with Amirah about my right to choose a pack. Director Whiteburn’s eyes nervously flicked to Jericho while Amirah reiterated the omega protections listed in the Designation Laws.
I had spent more time with my parents the past couple of days than I had the past few years. Besidesthe incidentat the DA, they had never visited me and I had never been allowed to leave. Outside trips were a privilege reserved forgoodomegas. Instead, I was mostly kept in solitary as punishment for various manufactured infractions. A tiny part of me had hoped the past few years had softened my parents—or at least my mother—that maybe she would decide to love me. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? But my parents’ hatred for me seemed to only grow.
I stared at my mother, her voice cold as she argued with Amirah, trying to find any hint of love or affection in her features. Her head snapped to meet my gaze and I shuddered at the blankness, the complete lack of…anythingI found there. At that moment, it was as if a hand reached down and snipped the final fragile strings that tied me to her, hitting my heart sharply with the recoil. The finality of it all, the realization that she would never be able to love or accept me, settled like a heavy stone in my stomach.
I turned away from her and sought refuge inside of myself, tuning out the chaos and thinking instead about moving in with Pack Ashwood. It still hadn’t sunk in that tomorrow I would be forced to leave my apartment, my first safe refuge, and move in with strangers. My inner omega danced at the thought of getting to spend more time with the sexy, yummy-smelling pack.Just think, now you’ll be able to have their scents on you all the time. Maybe you can even steal some of their clothes.
I felt… comfortable around them. And aroused. Two things I didn’t think possible. I also needed to know what happened with Theo at Trader Joe’s.
“Excellent. I’m glad we’re all in agreement that the Designation Laws give Josie the right to choose her own pack. I’ll contact Pack Ashwood and tell them to expect you all tomorrow morning.”
I snapped back to reality at Amirah’s terse tone. Dizzying relief washed over me as I processed what she said. For once, the Designation Laws were on my side. Gratitude for Amirah filled me, and I shot her a tremulous smile.
I mumbled an excuse about needing the restroom and slipped away before my parents could vent more of their wrath on me. Alone, the numbness that had settled over my body faded, leaving me with the excruciating pain of my emotions. I stared at myself in the mirror and didn’t recognize the person looking back at me. She was wearing my clothes, but I couldn’t quite place myself in her body. I was floating, unable to come back to earth.
My breaths came faster and I knew another panic attack was imminent. I hunched over the bathroom sink, trying to force deep breaths when it hit me—the faint scents of the alphas still clinging to my clothes. In my life, there were few alphas whose scents I found tolerable or, even more rare, likable. Sam’s floral scent was playful and comforting, the smell of the best days of my childhood spent with him. Luc’s earthy leather scent had come to mean safety. But no scent had ever called to me like these alphas. No scent calmed me this easily.
The shaking in my limbs settled, and my breaths came more easily with each slow inhale of their scents. Another wave of slick burst from my core. I crinkled my nose and shifted with discomfort. This was so messy. How did other omegas deal with it? My body was urging me to have sex when I was nowhere near ready for that, nowhere near the point of trusting these alphas. But my omega didn’t know that. All she knew was these three alphas were delicious and sexy and… safe? I wanted it to be true, but my hand gripped the scar on my upper arm, forever the reminder of the consequences of betrayal.
I pushed the memories aside, gripping the bathroom counter with my hands.Don’t go there. I indulged myself in another inhale, pressing my nose against the soft fabric of the jumpsuit. Cam’s cinnamon roll scent, Theo’s warm coffee, and Ben’s spiced apple wafted around me, surrounding me like a hug.Fuck, that was like omega Xanax. I allowed myself a few more moments in the bathroom’s quiet before moving to the door.
I was about to open it when I heard raised voices. They were muffled, but I could pick out Jericho’s deep alpha tones. I pressed my ear against the door to hear more clearly.
“Remember what you owe us, director. You want to keep us happy, or you know what the consequences will be.”
