“It’s okay to miss them, angel,” he said thoughtfully, gripping my chin. “But selfishly, I’m bloody thrilled we had this time together.” He winked, a smirk tugging at his lips as he slowly ran his eyes down my body.
I wasn’t wearing a bra and felt my nipples hardening against my tank top. I shifted in my seat again, a sore twinge in my vagina reminding me I’d had sex twice last night and fallen asleepwith his knot still inside me. Even with my soreness, I wanted to feel him inside me again. I let out a contented sigh, thinking about how patient and gentle he had been, how good he’d made me feel. I had been so scared to have sex, but now I wanted more. I blushed, wondering what sex with Cam and Ben would be like when icy anxiety seized me.
“Wait, do Ben and Cam know we had sex?” I asked, my chest feeling uncomfortably tight.
Theo looked up from his phone. “I haven’t told them,” he hedged, gently wrapping his hand in my hair. “But they probably felt it through the bond. Why, love? Do you not want them to know?”
“Are they going to be mad?” I asked, my voice almost a whisper. What was the etiquette around sex in a pack? I needed to ask Poppy.
Theo’s brow furrowed. “Of course not, angel. We all want you to be happy, and that includes making sure you get alone time with each of us. And even if they are jealous, that’s not for you to deal with.”
I scrunched my nose, confused. “Why wouldn’t it be my issue to deal with?”
“Because you’re not responsible for how we feel.”
I heard Theo’s words, but I couldn’t make sense of them. “Growing up, it was always my fault if someone was angry at me,” I blurted out.
Theo’s grip on my hair tightened as he tilted my head so I met his gaze.
“It was never your fault. They just wanted to break you down,” he said fiercely.
A gush of slick soaked my underwear at his intensity, and I suppressed a whimper.
“Fuck,” he groaned, pulling me into his arms. “You smell so good.”
I took a deep breath and snuggled into his embrace. I still felt anxious about Ben and Cam finding out, but if Theo said it wouldn’t be a problem, I needed to trust him.
He had me review the food order to see if I wanted to make any changes before submitting it.
“You want to watch something while we wait?” he asked, keeping his arms around me. Theo had been the most hesitant about physical touch, but since last night, he hadn’t stopped touching me. I loved it.
“I actually had another idea,” I said, twisting my fingers together.
“What is it?” He held me a little tighter as if sensing my nervousness.
“I was wondering if maybe you could help me practice resisting your bark.”
I’d gotten the idea last night but knew it was a risky request after Theo told me about his history of using his alpha bark. I had a feeling he needed to redefine his relationship with his bark just as much as I did. I wanted to erase the guilt he felt for what he’d been forced to do. I hoped if he used it on me, it could help him get more comfortable with that part of himself again.
Theo’s hand paused its soothing exploration of my back, and his breath hitched. “You would want me to do that?” he asked, his eyes filled with vulnerability. “You would trust me? After what I told you yesterday?”
I looked at Theo with confusion. “Why wouldn’t I trust you? What happened when you were younger wasn’t your fault. I know you won’t use your bark to actually force me into anything I don’t want to do.”
He said nothing for a long time, his eyes looking into the distance.
“We don’t have to. Forget I asked,” I said, my skin prickling with anxiety.
Theo’s gaze locked back on mine. “Sorry, I was lost in thought. Your trust means everything, my love. I’d like to give it a try.”
I smiled, pulling him in for a kiss. “Thank you,” I murmured.
“How do we do this?” he asked.
“We could do the same thing I tried in class? We stand across the room from each other and you tell me to walk towards you.”
“There’s only one problem with that, angel.”
“What?”
