‘She’s probably wedding planning,’ Richard chips in.
‘Wedding? Whose wedding?’ Nicola shrieks.
‘Haven’t you . . .’ Richard’s question trails off as he gives me a querying look. I shake my head briskly, but it’s too late.
‘You’re NOT!’ Nicola cries.
I shrug, embarrassed.
‘She is! When? When did he ask you?’
I glance at Richard, who is staring at me with a strange expression on his face. ‘Two weeks ago.’
‘And you kept it from us?’ Nicola all but hollers. ‘Why? Why would you do such a thing?’
‘Yes, Lily, why?’ Richard asks as quietly as the loud music will allow.
I give him a hopeless look. ‘I didn’t want to take anything away from Nathan and Lucy.’
‘Who the hell are Nathan and Lucy?’ Mel chips in, very unhelpfully I might add.
‘They don’t even know Nathan and Lucy,’ Richard says, and I shrug again. Even Nicola, who is halfway down the tipsy hill to drunk, starts to register the uncomfortable atmosphere.
‘I’m starving!’ Josh exclaims. ‘Can we get out of here, or what?’
‘I didn’t want them to make a big fuss,’ I tell Richard later as we lag behind the others on our way out of the restaurant. He’s been avoiding my gaze throughout the entire meal and I need to say something now because I’ve been feeling a bit sick for the past two hours. ‘I’m still getting used to the idea myself,’ I continue to explain when he doesn’t comment. ‘Richard, please say something.’
‘It’s fine.’
‘You don’t sound fine.’
‘I’m a little concerned,’ he admits, glancing at me with his warm brown eyes and it does nothing to expel the bad feeling in my stomach. ‘You’ve been acting strangely ever since I . . . I just don’t know if there’s something else going on. You’re always off out with your camera, and I guess you seem different somehow.’
‘I don’t know what you mean. Yes, I’ve been taking photos,’ I say crossly, ‘but how could you possibly have a problem with that? It makes me happy.’
‘It never made you happy before.’
‘It did! I used to love using my camera.’
‘Why did you stop then?’
I can’t find the words to answer.
‘It seems to have come out of nowhere,’ he explains. ‘I feel like I don’t know you.’
‘I’m sorry if it makes you feel threatened,’ I say coldly.
‘It’s not tha—’
‘But I’m not going to stop.’ I cruelly cut him off, even though I heard the softening in his voice.
‘Suit yourself,’ he says unhappily, as he stalks off down the pavement towards the others. Mel is trying to flag down a taxi while Nicola is gazing up at Josh through her heavily mascaraed lashes. He’s grinning down at her with his hands in his pockets. The sight does nothing to quell my nausea, but I’ve had just about enough. If he wants to screw her, so be it. I don’t know Tina, but I’ll be disappointed in Josh if he lets her down.
A six-seater taxi pulls up and we all climb in. Richard and I get in the very back and sit apart from each other, staring out of the window at the city lights flashing past. Nicola has squeezed herself between Mel and Josh. The last place I feel like going right now is a club. I know Richard feels the same. I glance across at my boyfriend and have a sudden impulse to take his hand. But I don’t.
We wind our way through the streets and pull up outside the venue in Kings Cross. Josh helps Nicola out of the taxi. I give Mel a rueful look as we walk up the steps to greet the bouncers.
‘This is turning out to be couples central,’ she murmurs. ‘I’m starting to wish my horny banker could have come along.’
