‘Pizza night,’ Charlie says to me the following afternoon.
‘You coming over?’ I ask eagerly.
‘Can I?’
‘I’d love you to! You’d better bring a sleeping bag this time.’
‘So I can crash in your wardrobe again?’
‘Better to be prepared.’
‘Didn’t April keep you awake?’
‘I didn’t mind,’ I say. ‘What?’ I ask at the look on his face.
‘Nothing,’ he replies, but he’s pursing his lips, trying not to smile as he turns away.
That afternoon, we walk along the Camel Trail together. I’m pushing Nicki’s bike so I can chat to him as we go. April points out the boats and the birds and the dogs and the bikes and anything else that takes her fancy, so we don’t talk to each other much.
I’ve now reached the end of Nicki’s notebooks and diaries and have made my way through most of the Post-it-noted pages from the books on her bookshelf. There were two other novels about people leading double married lives up there, and, after reading Nicki’s ‘female bigamist’ comment, I now firmly believe that Nicki intended for Kit to marry both MorrisandTimo. What I still haven’t figured out yet is how it will all unravel.
Because itwillunravel.
I love Kit, despite everything she’s done and is doing, but she’s got to pay for mistakes this big.
I’m not sure if that’s what Nicki would have wanted, but I’m behind the wheel now and Kit, unfortunately, has it coming for her.
I mean, imagine if she fell pregnant. She wouldn’t even know whose baby it was. What sort of person puts herself in that position? What would she do? Would she confess to them both and hope that the father sticks around nine months later when the paternity test is carried out?
I don’t think so.
Would she gamble and hide the pregnancy from one of them until she gives birth? Would that even be feasible?
And how could she possibly raise it?Wherewould she raise it? If she chose Morris as the dad – and, let’s face it, he would make agreatdad – then how could she bear to be away from her son or daughter while she’s travelling?
That would the most intense double life. Childless with Timo versus being the mother of Morris’s child.
Surely she couldn’t do it.
Surely she’d neverchooseto do it. She couldn’t get away with it, even if she wanted to.
Maybe she discovers that she can’t have children... Or perhaps she decides that she doesn’t want to!
Or maybe shedoeswant to, but that’s her penance for falling in love with two men.
I come to a stop on the pavement.
‘What is it?’ Charlie asks.
‘I’ve just had an idea,’ I tell him. ‘I’ll catch you up, I want to write it down.’
That’s it, I think to myself distractedly as I get my notepad out and Charlie continues on, pushing April away along the footpath. Kit has always wanted a family, but, in choosing to marry both MorrisandTimo, she knows she’s making that sacrifice.
And –oh, my God!– Morris wants children so much that it kills their relationship when she refuses to relent!
That’s it! I’ve got it.
Morris is the one to end it.
