Maybe they were moving into another phase together. Something like their first friendship. Constant intimacy, careful boundaries.
Shiloh realized she’d be okay with that. She’d want it, if that was on offer—
Cary, back in her life again. A place inhislife. Shiloh liked being an emergency contact. She just wantedcontact. She wanted to pull thoseold warm feelings through the empty years and into the present. She wanted to repot them here and find them a nice sunny window.
Did Shiloh want to be the person Cary called when he was feeling low? Or evenaperson hecouldcall?
One hundred percent yes. Onethousandpercent.
Especially if it meant she could call him, too.
She stroked his hand with her thumb. Shiloh could manage not to kiss him. She’d managed not to kiss him for the best years of their friendship.
She would take Cary, as a friend. Halfway across the world but still in her sphere.
Cary’s thumb started moving on her hand. His shoulder sank into hers. Shiloh tilted her head toward him—and then felt his head rest against hers.
She closed her eyes.
She could make this work.
“Shiloh?”
She startled.
“Hey... it’s okay.” Cary was sitting next to her. Her body was warm where she’d been leaning against him. “Why don’t you go up to bed?”
“Sorry,” Shiloh said, sitting up. “Sorry. Let me help you make up the couch.”
“I’ve got it. Go to sleep.”
“Yeah,” Shiloh said, rubbing her face. “Okay.” She stood up. After a second, she looked back at him. “Good night, Cary.”
“Good night.”
Shiloh went up to her room. She plugged in her phone. It was 3:30a.m.
Thirty-Three
It was Ryan’s weekend to have the kids. Normally he’d pick them up Friday afternoon, from daycare. But he’d had a show that night, so he was picking them up this morning, on Saturday, instead. Which would have been fine...
Except Cary was still fast asleep on Shiloh’s couch.
She kept the kids upstairs when they woke up. She got them dressed and started putting on their shoes. The plan was to take them outside fifteen minutes early and wait with them out there for their dad.
But Ryan decided to cometwentyminutes early.
He knocked on the front door—shave and a haircut, two bits. (Ryan had made her hate “Shave and a Haircut.” He ruined everything.)
“Okay,” she said, “Daddy’s here, and you guys are all ready. So we’re going to gostraightoutthe door without waking up Grandma.”
“Very quiet,” Junie whispered.
“Very quiet!” Gus shouted.
“Yep,” Shiloh said, picking him up.
Gus immediately went stiff as a board. “No, I walk! Gus-Gus walks!”
