I look up at her, startled. “I don’t want them to disappear.”
That’s a lie; I want themgone.I want to be myself again. I want to be free. But… I can’t. Yet. I can’t explain why not. (Even to myself.)
“Temporarily,” Penny says. “I think it will just make them go away for a while, until the spell wears off.”
“What about this?” I flick my tail again.
“We’ll have to use another spell. Or you can tuck it.”
America…
I never really thought I’d get to America—unless I had to chase the Humdrum there.
“The thing is…” Penny bites her bottom lip and wrinkles her nose, like she’s both ashamed and excited. “I’ve already bought the tickets!”
“Penelope!” It’s a bad idea. I havewings.And no money. And I don’t want to get dumped by my boyfriend at the Statue of Liberty. I’d rather get dumped right here, thanks. Also I don’t know how to drive. “We can’t just—”
She starts singing “Don’t Stop Believing.” Which is hardly the United States’ national anthem, but it was our favourite song in third year, when we first said we were going to take this road trip, someday, when we’d won the war.
Well… we have won the war, haven’t we? (Never thought that would mean killing the Mage and sacrificing my own magic, but it’s still, technically, a win.)
Penny is telling me to“hold on to that feel-layy-anng.”Baz is watching us from the door.
“If you’ve already bought the tickets…” I say.
Penny jumps to her feet on the sofa. “Yes! We’re going on holiday!” She stops and looks at Baz. “Are you in?”
Baz is still looking at me. “If you think I’m letting you traipse around a foreign country by yourselves, especially in this political climate—”
Penelope is jumping again. “America!”
3
PENELOPE
All right, so, yes, things haven’t been going so well. AndIshould have been the one to see it coming.
WasSimonsupposed to see it coming? He doesn’t see anything coming! He’s taken aback by Tuesdays!
Was Baz supposed to see it coming? All Baz has been able to focus on for the last year is Simon; he can’t see past the hearts in his own eyes.
No, it should have been me.
But I was just so happy to bethrougheverything. The Humdrum vanquished, the Mage revealed, most of us still alive to talk about it… Simon, all in one piece! Simon with extra pieces, yes, but hale and whole, with a future!
Simon Snow, in no grave danger—my most ardent prayer answered.
I just wanted toenjoyit.
I wanted to get a flat and go to university, and just be a normal teenager for once, before we left our teens behind us. I didn’t want to do anything radical—I didn’t fuck off to California andleave my magic wand behind, for example. But I wanted to relax.
Lesson learned: Relaxation is themostinsidious humdrum.
We all moved to London last year and started uni, as if our world hadn’t just been turned upside down and shaken. As if Simon hadn’t just been turned inside out.
I mean—he killedthe Mage,the closest thing he’d ever had to a father. It was an accident, but still.
And the Mage killed Ebb, who wasn’t exactly Simon’s mother figure, but who was definitely like his weird aunt. EbblovedSimon. She treated him like he was one of her little goats.
